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February 11, 2020

AND IN SPORTS

Moms clash at children’s dance recital at Ann Arbor school, police say

(Thanks to pharmaross)

AUSTRALIANS IN ACTION

Coronavirus-quarantined couple on Diamond Princess cruise reportedly order wine via drone

Key Quote:"The Japanese Coast Guard did not know what the f--- was going on."

(Thanks to John Lobert)

THIS WOULDN'T HAPPEN IF AIRLINES FED THEIR CUSTOMERS

Plane made emergency landing when drunk passenger started eating his mobile phone

(Thanks to pharmaross)

SUNSHINE STATE EDUCATOR OF THE WEEK SO FAR

Florida 1st grade teacher tried to buy an 'eight ball' of meth while at school, authorities say

(Thanks to Joshua Evans, who says "teaching will do that to you.")

BRILLIANT

This Pregnant Mom Packed A Nerf Gun In Her Hospital Bag In Case Her Husband Fell Asleep Again

(Thanks to Cyn Schoenbrun)

NEW YORK, NEW YORK!

A straphanger in morning A train pulled a bottle of ketchup from his bag and squirted a perimeter on the train car floor to keep folks from crowding his seat

(Thanks to pharmaross and Ralph, who says "Unrefrigerated, of course.")

THE NEWS FROM ABROAD

We don't totally understand it. But it sounds bad.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

YOU'VE HEARD OF GIVING 110 PERCENT? *THIS* IS GIVING 110 PERCENT.

Stripper falls off 15-foot pole, breaks jaw — and keeps twerking

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson and pharmaross)

HARSH

Art critic is slammed after she 'accidentally' destroys a $20,000 glass installation which shattered when she 'placed an empty soda can on it to show her disdain for the work' at Mexico's top art fair

(Thanks to James Flynn)

GET READY, VIRGINIANS!

Sex for unmarried people in Virginia might be legal soon

(Thanks to pharmaross)

AT THE SAME TIME?

Ford thinks people will be making out and eating shrimp in the electric Mustang Mach-E

In Florida, they will be doing these things while driving.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

 
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