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January 09, 2020

MIAMI DINING REPORT

Salt Bae’s restaurant called cops on customer who wouldn’t pay for gold-wrapped steaks

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A guy in Florida who likes everything wrapped in gold and refuses to pay his bills? Sounds familiar . . .

People actually pay extra for an instagram star to hand feed them? I'd pay extra for them to go away and leave me alone. Most of the steaks I get when I go out to eat come with an aluminum foil wrapped baked potato and a Bloomin' Onion.

"They landed on the big-ticket items: a pair of $1,000 steaks and a rack of lamb, each wrapped in edible gold."

Would you use A1 steak sauce on these guys ?

If he was stupid enough to eat there in the first place, should I have sympathy for the sucker?

But I wasn't clear about the "hand feeding" part. Does the "chef" cut your meat into bite-size pieces and fork them into your pie hole? Because OK, that would be fun for a bite or two.

This would never work in Texas. First, we don't eat gold. Recovery of it would be, shall we say, unsatisfying work for not enough of a payoff. And here "hand feeding" means holding the T-bone in your hands and gnawing the meat off it.

At least they didn't order it well done, with ketchup, unlike someone in the White House.

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