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September 19, 2019


Today be IntARRRnational Talk Like a Pirate Day! Here be the official site, and here be the Wikipedia arrrrticle. Here be the original column. Here and here be lists of freebies. Remember, me hearties: There be many stupid fake holidays, but Talk Like a Pirate Day definitely be one of them. So get out there and swash them buckles!


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Aye, 'tis good to see yer up early, Captain Dave! On such an auspicious occasion, t'would be shameful to miss the sunrise over the mainsail.

I was up early meself, just polishing me anchor. Think I'll head to the poop deck.
Peace and love, me hearties!!

-First Mate Stix

When sailing the seven seas, where does the pirate captain walk the ships dog?
On the poop deck....

I’m hoping to find the neon green DWTS pirate shirt for today. Or Halloween. Or a wedding


nursecindy be reminding me of this day yesterday.

Need help coming up with your very own personal pirate identity? Try the Pirate Name Generator!

Not happy with the result? Try again! Still not happy? Walk the damn plank.


'Tis I that were borrrrrn ready fer this.

Arrrrr! Walk the plank ye scurvy pegleg padraig the cheesehead pirate.
Seriously you couldn't find a shorter name? Some of us pirates are busy!

AHOY, me hearties!

Errol Flynn should have changed his name to ARRol Flynn.

I've been growling at work all year, so I am more than prepared.

nursecindy, you're speaking "pirate"! Does this mean you're no longer the buxom wench? I'm asking for one of the other blog guys.

"I see a ship approaching on the horizon. YARRRRk! Ready the canons. YARRRK! YARRRRK! Get those wenches off the sun deck and secure them below. YARRRRK! YARRRRK! YARRRRK! And shut that damn dog up."

Jelly Legs, yesterday I was at the grocery store and I had my arms full of things. Mostly Muscadine grapes because I love them. While I was trying to "jiggle" things around a guy ran his cart into a display of oranges. The last time I saw him he was still picking them up so I like to think I'm still a buxom wench. Or it could be he was just a klutz.

Cowerin' Harley Hacke is me moniker, mateys

Arrrr, 'tis easy to TLAP when yer got the laryn-gee-itis, me hearrrties!

How about a pirate yarn?

Aye aye said the pirate
with eyes of stone
I'll cut yer flesh
right off the bone
and then ye sail the seven seas
workin' the "Dutchman" on yer knees
'till you find the gates of hell
then ye know you've served me well
ghost forever you'll remain
sailin' down the Spanish Main.

I never get invited to any pirate events for some reason.

@nursecindy, you'll always be our buxom wench.

Avast! That didn't come out quite right. I be in trouble now.

She be heftin' a buxom wrench now.. beware!

The Captain's Wife's Lament

Thanks, Cap'n Dave! Cap'n Slappy, a handful o' friends and I (Jezebel, the erstwhile Webwench) hoisted a few at the local brewpub (which happens to share a fence with Slappy's back yard, although he has yet to persuade them to install a tap in the fence). We raised a glass in your honor, as one of the patron saints o' Talk Like A Pirate Day!

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