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August 15, 2019

WELL *THIS* SEEMS TOTALLY SANE

This woman implanted her Tesla Model 3's valet key into her arm

(Thanks to John Criswell and Rod Nunley, who says "It won't be fun when it comes time to trade it in.")

THIS IS A JOKE, RIGHT?

RIGHT??

SHE ALSO HAD MORE THAN 40 TURTLES

Fort Myers woman who pulled gator from pants during traffic stop receives probation

(Thanks to pharmaross)

TOTALLY PLAUSIBLE

Bangkok woman hospitalised after she falls over and a cucumber ended up inside her

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

AFTER A WHILE YOU GET TIRED OF HAVING TO BUILD THEM YOURSELF

Car thief Henry Ford arrested in Michigan

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

MEANWHILE IN FLATHEAD COUNTY

9:36 p.m. An elderly man was walking around town in sweatpants.

(Thanks to Roberto)

ATTENTION BARGAIN-HUNTERS

NASA Giving Away Apollo-Era Saturn Rocket to Anyone who can Carry it Out

(Thanks to Tom Kopec)

WE SAW THEM OPEN FOR THE COWSILLS

Jumping worms state’s latest invasive species

(Thanks to Dave N.)

GOOD TO KEEP BUSY

Driver contacted by State Patrol after found playing 'Pokemon Go' on 8 phones

(Thanks to B'game, Mark Buckley and John Criswell)

"I WAS LIKE, 'OH, NO, DO THE ANNOUNCEMENT'"

Man Gets Delta Plane All To Himself And, Of Course, He Filmed The Whole Thing

(Thanks to Rick Day)

HO HUM

Bloodthirsty squirrels are lurking in NYC park

(Thanks to DaninDallas)

THE SCIENCE IS SETTLED

Watching football IS good for you: Scientists discover fans get a 'cardio workout similar to a 90-minute brisk walk'

They're talking about soccer. But still. Science!

(Thanks to Lind Schutjer and Mark Schlesinger)

HE'S LUCKY HE'S ALIVE

Man who attacked Batman Suparman gets 2.5 years’ jail, 6 strokes of the cane

(Thanks to Jay Brandes)

TRADEMARK THIS

Ohio State University wants to trademark the word 'The'

(Thanks to Steve K, pharmaross and Mark Schlesinger)

'I WAS LIKE, THIS MAN REALLY JUST HIT HIMSELF WITH THE NUNCHUKS'

Florida man threatens neighbors with nunchucks and bug spray, but only injures himself

(Thanks to John Lobert and pharmaross)

 
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