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June 10, 2019

WE PLAN TO BE DEAD

Plan to alter Earth’s ORBIT to escape being eaten by dying Sun

(Thanks to Le Petomane, who asks “What could possibly go wrong?”)

Comments

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Sounds like The Wandering Earth project.

This is great! Scientists have found another way to scare us all to death. On the other hand, it's 5 billion years away so keep making those mortgage payments.

I’m heading for Uranus.

"He said: 'At the moment we cannot even envisage how we could built such a large solar sail on the ground and then send it into space, where it would be deployed.'"

Just order it and some rockets from the Acme Corporation.

This is sort of what the Puppeteers did in the RINGWORLD series of books.

Surely Le Pet's neighbors there in Roswell have had to deal with this somewhere else in the galaxy. We just need to contract them to handle it.

@Rod Nunley--I checked with the nearest aliens and they suggested the sick sun god could be appeased by sacrificing the planet Venus. I really think they were messing with me.

I checked with a local scientist who knows lots of stuff. He claims the sail thing won't work because if the Earth started sailing away, it would eventually fall off the edge of the solar system.

Tell it to the cockroaches.

So, what's Plan "B" if that fails?

LePet, you mean to say you live near Gene Simmons?

According to Q (Star Trek: TNG), all we have to do to move the planet is lower the gravitational constant of the universe. What's the problem?

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