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May 15, 2019


Florida man arrested for slapping girlfriend in face with cheeseburger

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, who says “We need to get those things out of civilian hands.”) 


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A gentleman would have asked 'Want fries with that'?

Was that whopper in a whapper ow was it unwhapped?
Inqwywing minds want to know.

How do you say love with a minimum of involvement to a burger-demanding troublemaker?

Depending on where it came from, it might have killed her.

Slapping someone with a nice, juicy cheeseburger is a hanging offense in Texas. Those folks demand their food be treated with respect.

They should haul him off to jail in a patty wagon.

I envision the police surrounding the Restaurant:
"Alright, we know you are in there, put down the Burger and come out with your hands up."

The suspect waived his rights.
"Have it your way," replied the arresting officer.

The company needs to put a positive spin on this, Chief. Let me swing some concepts with you:
“Multi-task with McDonald’s! Have a tasty treat, or beat our meat!”

Fired? Why??

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