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March 16, 2019

'UNIMOONS?'

But during their 2016 trip, the Dublin-based couple didn’t share the same bed, they didn’t eat a meal together nor did they officially consummate their marriage during their honeymoon. That’s because Ms. O’Brien, 37, a stylist and writer, and Mr. Maclaine, 40, a golf and corporate photographer, took separate honeymoons, otherwise known as solomoons or unimoons. After their wedding, Ms. O’Brien celebrated in Canada, while Mr. Maclaine and his friends flew to France.

(Thanks to Ross C)

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Unimoon once opened for Moon Unit Zappa. The show was, like, totally awesome.

Don't stand so close to me and take it a step farther, go your own way. Far, far away. Poison Ivy. Any Bobby Goldsboro song.

Red Skelton had some good advice for a happy marriage.

"My wife and I go to a nice restaurant twice a week. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays."

"We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California, mine is in Texas."

"And remember, marriage is the number one cause of divorce."

Rodney Dangerfield:

"My wife wants to have sex in the back seat of the car. And she wants me to drive!"

More from Rodney:

I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.

With my wife I don’t get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to ‘the best woman a man ever had.’ The waiter joined me.

My wife can’t cook at all. She made chocolate mousse. An antler got stuck in my throat.

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife.

My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it.

I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.

My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home.

My wife’s jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.

I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.

My wife was afraid of the dark… then she saw me naked and now she’s afraid of the light.

We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations – we’re doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.

My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.

My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.

It’s tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won’t drink from my glass.


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