OTHER THAN THAT THEY WORK GREAT
Chinese customers warned of electric shock risk from toilet seats
(Thanks to Ralph)
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March 22, 2019
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Electric booga-loo?
Posted by: OldPhil | March 22, 2019 at 09:46 AM
"Death on the bidet" was a rejected S.King short story.
Posted by: ImNotDave | March 22, 2019 at 10:21 AM
It'ss not faulty. That's a hidden feature. A built-in timer that says, "Hey, let's move along. You weren't going to finish that Sudoku anyway; it's level 4, for Pete's sake."
Posted by: Stixnstonz | March 22, 2019 at 10:22 AM
Exactly, Stixnstonz. Dad taking too long on the toilet? Not any more.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | March 22, 2019 at 10:31 AM
It would definitely help constipated people.
Posted by: Qaz | March 22, 2019 at 10:35 AM
Just in time for my colonoscopy prep
Posted by: Not My Usual Alias | March 22, 2019 at 10:43 AM
Faulty? Substandard?!
These terms, along with haphazard, slapdash, and slipshod are to be used to describe the investigation and reporting on these smart toilet seats.
*Nowhere* in the article does it inform of this breakthrough medical technology for electroconvulsive and aversion therapies.
Posted by: Slim Chance | March 22, 2019 at 10:51 AM
Great, now everyone's going to start hovering over the seat. Judi is going to be hurting a lot of people.
Posted by: wanderer2575 | March 22, 2019 at 10:52 AM
Gannon and I were working the Chinatown division. It was a rainy afternoon and the aroma of fried pork hung heavy in the air as a bad Chinese dumpling. We both disliked working Chinatown because an hour after shift we were both hungry for a cheeseburger.
The call we responded to was a man smoking illegally in a restroom. We tried to talk the man out, but he kept smoking illegally. I kicked the door in and we both knew right away this perp was a serial smoker, smoking his last smoke. Also we knew we wouldn't want a cheeseburger after this shift was over.
----Joe Friday
Posted by: Le Petomane | March 22, 2019 at 11:02 AM
So the Chinese promptly attached a second ground wire to wrap around your other testicle in order to create a more stable ground. /fixed.
Posted by: manual tomato | March 22, 2019 at 11:09 AM
@LePetomane -
"Fortunately for us, calls like this one are rare. Unfortunately for our suspect, this one was well-done."
Posted by: Stixnstonz | March 22, 2019 at 11:39 AM
I managed to avoid the squat toilets for the year I was in China, which was no small feat when I had a few months of gastric distress. My shower had open electrical wires that went with the water heater, so I still experienced the choice of shock from cold water or shock from electricity in the morning.
Posted by: Not My Usual Alias | March 22, 2019 at 11:41 AM
In other toilet seat news, this model purports to be a life saver.
Posted by: Jim | March 22, 2019 at 12:06 PM
@Stixnstonz--Thanks for the better bad ending. At least Joe and Gannon didn't have to grill the suspect.
Posted by: Le Petomane | March 22, 2019 at 12:59 PM
@ Le Pet-
^5
Posted by: Stixnstonz | March 22, 2019 at 01:13 PM
Shanghai Surprise indeed.
Posted by: Rudolph | March 22, 2019 at 05:05 PM