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February 16, 2019

AMERICA IS GETTING GREATER AND GREATER

A Tampa man reported an income of $18,497. The IRS sent him a refund check for $980,000.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

BAD BONNIE!

This dog got more than she bargained for when she tore open a parcel meant for a neighbour and discovered a six-inch sex toy.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

PRETTY GREAT

Westminster without the dogs.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

THEY SOUND FUN

A couple from Benedict is accused of consistent urination at I-80 rest areas in York County which resulted in the damage of public property.

(Thanks to Hayseen Tom, who says “I was expecting a livestream.”)

GUYS IN ACTION

Kentucky man mistakenly gets wife turnips instead of tulips

(Thanks to John Lobert)

KIDS LOVE ‘EM

Florida men accused of trafficking cocaine to Ohio inside boxes of Lunchables

(Thanks to Steve K, who says “Those are pretty good snacks, dude.”)

WE CAN’T WAIT FOR THE LIAM NEESON MOVIE

An octogenarian tackled a burglar who attempted to steal his model railway collection and sat on him with his wife until police arrived to make an arrest, a court heard

(Thanks to Rod Nunley)

THE NEWS FROM ASIA

Doctor who wrongly filled balloon with gas before it burst inside Hong Kong woman’s anus ‘may have been distracted’

This has been The News From Asia.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

WE SAW THE SPACE HARPOONS OPEN FOR PRETEND JUNK

A harpoon flung from a satellite has successfully captured a piece of pretend junk in an experiment that could have major implications for how we clean up the huge mess people have made in outer space.

(Thanks to The Perts)

‘BELLY BUSTING’ WAS INVOLVED

York man accused of strangling his brother during Valentine’s Day fight over flowers

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

 
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