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February 03, 2019

SUPER BOWL LCVVDXXIIICMMC

May the best team win. Unless it's the Patriots.

THIS IS EXACTLY WHY WE HAVE POLICE

McDonald’s customer calls police after employee put onions on his Big Mac

(Thanks to John Lobert)

YES, IT WAS LOADED

Florida man robs Gainesville restaurant at finger point, charged with armed robbery

(Thanks to pharmaross)

SPOILER ALERT: IT WAS A SQUIRREL

A paternity test on a baby orangutan has come back with a surprising result.

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)

OTHER THAN THAT HE HAD AN UNEVENTFUL FLIGHT

Drunken WestJet passenger ordered to pay airline $21K in fuel costs

(Thanks to MOTW and pharmaross)

CSI: COTTONWOOD (HAR)

Tattoo on penis leads to arrest in nude photo case

(Thanks to pharmaross)

SPORTS UPDATE

Pair Of Frozen Sweatpants Throw In The Freezing Cold Stick A Perfect Landing

(Thanks to John Lobert)

TERRORISM UPDATE

City loses appeal of electrical damage caused by squirrel

(Thanks to Bill Hudginsm pharmaross and Ralph)

DEDICATION

Myers eventually came to a stop and she and her two passengers were ordered out of the car. As she laid down on the ground with her arms out for officers, Myers took one last chug of beer.

(Thanks to elseabs and pharmaross)

 
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