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January 07, 2019

PENALTY: DEATH

Swiping chicken tenders left on Alabama highway is a crime, officials say

(Thanks to funny man, pharmaross and John Lobert)

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It isn't considered road kill?

Now — extra-tenderized for your dining convenience...

It wasn't the stopping for the tenders that caused the gridlock--it was trying to find some damn honey mustard sauce close by!

Why did it take over 24 hours to clean up the spilled chicken? Was Jeff Sessions in charge of the investigation?

Around here, 1) it would have been cleaned up quickly, and
2) at 16° it wouldn't have spoiled.

Just tell everyone they're that brand that's hard and nasty.

PROBLEM SOLVED.

( fOR LEGAL REASONS CANT SAY, BUT RHYMES WITH A VACUMN. If you don't know, visit a wholesale club and try several brands. You will find it.)

What if we're just helping them cross the road?

Everyone knows it's okay to swipe chicken tenders right, instead of left.

@MOTW - Thank you! That's how I originally read it too. They messed with us by combining the sounds of "Swipe Left" and "Tinder"!

We call that part of Alabama, "Georgia."

If that truckload of chicken tenders had overturned anywhere near Geezer Acres, the evidence would have been swiped both left and right before the cops got there.

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