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January 30, 2019

MEANWHILE DOWN UNDER

Oblivious Tourist In Australia Picks Up Extremely Deadly Blue-Ringed Octopus

(Thanks to John Lobert, who says "Anyone who picks up ANYTHING in Australia is nuts.")

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Nimrod.

I misread the headline as:

Obese Tourist In Australia Picks Up Extremely Deadly Blue-Ringed Octopus

This would make a great Agatha Christie mystery, "The Calamari Case." All along, you'd think that the butler did it, because the blue-ringed octopus looked so wide-eyed and innocent. But, you can't fool Miss Marple!

Funny, because I saw Oblivious Tourist open for Matthew McConaughey at DopeFest '99.

Anything with 8 Legs should be avoided on principle: spiders, octopi, street corner gangs...

Don't Aussies and Kiwis basically walk around in head-to-toe Kevlar anyway?

And pick up that pretty cone shell while you're at it.

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