OR PERHAPS THIS IS JUST A DAILY MAIL FIXATION
(Thanks to Ralph and funny man)
« December 2018 | Main | February 2019 »
January 31, 2019
OR, IN POLICE-RADIO CODE, A 10-117
ANOTHER DAY IN THE SUNSHINE STATE
FLORIDA MAN ATTACKS WIFE WITH TACO BELL LUNCH 'CAUSING SOME TO GO UP INTO HER NOSE'
(Thanks to pharmaross)
IF THAT DOESN'T WIN HER HEART, WE DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL
New Mexico woman says she keeps getting pee-covered bologna from stranger
(Thanks to pharmaross)
WE HARDLY KNEW YE
STUDENTS OF SOUTH DAKOTA:
January 30, 2019
HOW RIDICULOUSLY COLD IS CHICAGO?
(Thanks to Steve K, who asks "What could possibly go wrong?")
Seriously folks, stay warm out there.
MAKES SENSE
Eating NUTS boosts sperm quality, according to new research
(Thanks to PhilB)
WE ARE FALLING FARTHER AND FARTHER BEHIND
Philippines festival sets Guinness record for dancing scarecrows
(Thanks to Bob Brogan)
BECAUSE THEY DON'T HAVE CONGRESS
WE HAD NO IDEA THE SITUATION WAS THIS DIRE
It's so cold in the parts of the Midwest, they can't deliver beer
(Thanks to Steve K)
MEANWHILE DOWN UNDER
Oblivious Tourist In Australia Picks Up Extremely Deadly Blue-Ringed Octopus
(Thanks to John Lobert, who says "Anyone who picks up ANYTHING in Australia is nuts.")
GO DIRECTLY TO JAIL
Family argument during game of Monopoly leaves 1 person injured in Kansas
(Thanks to pharmaross)
WE'VE HAD THAT MANY TIMES
More than 36,000 pounds of Tyson chicken nuggets recalled because they may contain rubber
(Thanks to Rod Nunley)
AW
Zoo offers Valentine's cockroach naming for spurned lovers
(Thanks to Al Barkafski and Ralph)
IN THAT CASE, SIR, PLEASE TAKE OUR POLICE CAR
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY WE HAVE 911
911 dispatcher helps boy with his fractions homework
(Thanks to The Perts)
EXCEPT IN FLORIDA, WHERE WE DON'T SPEND MUCH TIME STEERING
The Average Steering Wheel Is 4 Times Filthier Than a Public Toilet Seat
(Thanks to Mike Leone)
January 29, 2019
THESE KIDS TODAY
Huge 60ft penis spotted on Scottish school’s playing fields from space satellite image
(Thanks to pharmaross)
PLEASE TELL US THIS IS A HOAX
Bride makes bridesmaids take lie detector test after shocking wedding details are leaked
(Thanks to John Lobert)
IT PROBABLY GOT LOST LOOKING FOR THE COMMODE
Australian family finds big snake in the shower
(Thanks to Bob Brogan)
HE WAS ON THE RUN
(Thanks to Dave Roe, Hayseed Tom, Al Barkafski and elseabs)
ONE WORD: SQUIRRELS
Couch atop Manhattan tree perplexes neighbors
(Thanks to pharmaross and Bob Brogan)
January 28, 2019
'SUSPICION'
‘[The driver was] shocked to find a car being driven with no front tyre.’
The motorist was arrested on suspicion of drink driving.
(Thanks to John Lobert)
DEPARTMENT OF JOBS YOU DID NOT KNOW EXISTED
(Thanks to pharmaross)
OR VERY WARM
New 'cage trousers' are baffling shoppers - and they don't look very comfortable
(Thanks to funny man and Bob Brogan)
'YOU DON'T TYPICALLY GET THE CUSTOMER'S BEST MOMENTS'
BECAUSE WHAT AUSTRALIA NEEDS IS FIT RATTLESNAKES
IT PROTECTED HIM FROM THE SQUIRRELS
Three-year-old boy missing in woods for two days says friendly bear kept him safe
(Thanks to The Perts)
OTHER THAN THAT IT WAS A LOVELY SERVICE
Car crashes through Massachusetts funeral home during service
(Thanks to Laurie Cavanaugh Bobskill)
DUDE
Joe Montana is getting into the pot-growing industry
(Thanks to pharmaross)
KIND OF LIKE LASSIE
Decomposing whale towed out to sea returns to shore again
(Thanks to Ralph)
January 27, 2019
AS VALENTINE'S DAY APPROACHES
CDC issues warning: Do not 'kiss or snuggle' hedgehogs
(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)
ALWAYS GOOD TO HAVE SPARES
Why was this man's luggage stuffed with 5,000 leeches?
(Thanks to Ron G. and Michael Parry)
JUST ANOTHER DAY IN THE SUNSHINE STATE
Florida Taco Bell Evacuated After Man Discovers WWII Hand Grenade While Magnet Fishing
(Thanks to pharmaross)
January 26, 2019
THIS HAS TO BE THE RUSSIANS
IT'S TIME WE KNEW
TIME FOR STRICT FEDERAL CONTROLS
Driver arrested for being under the influence of vanilla extract
(Thanks to Ralph)
SENIOR GUYS IN ACTION
The two drivers became embroiled in a verbal altercation, and at one point 65-year-old Richard Kamrowski, of Framingham, jumped onto the hood of the second vehicle, a 2016 Infiniti QX70 SUV, Procopio said. At that point, the second driver, 37-year-old Mark Fitzgerald, of Lynn, drove away from the scene with Kamrowski on the hood of the car.
(Thanks to Ann)
January 25, 2019
GOOD BOY!
'WITH DETACHABLE HEAD'
Ozzy Osbourne honors bat-biting anniversary with commemorative plush toy
(Thanks to Stan Ruth)
GUYS IN ACTION
A Drunk Man Swallowed a Live, Venomous, Spiny Catfish
(Thanks to Rick Day)
A MAN HAS TO DO WHAT A MAN HAS TO DO
Drunk man throws two cellos and a viola off a train
(Thanks to Bill Carver, who says "He was looking for an accordion.")
THE SCIENCE IS SETTLED
10-year-old attempts to prove Tom Brady is a "cheater" in winning science fair project
(Thanks to funny man)
WE'RE SURE HE HAD A GOOD REASON
THERE IS EXCITEMENT, AND THEN THERE IS...
(Thanks to Allen at Division)
WE BET IT WAS PROVIDED BY THE SQUIRRELS
Two coyotes in Ballard got drunk on craft beer
(Thanks to Iceman)
January 24, 2019
NAME THAT CONTINENT!
Woman bitten on bum by snake while part-way through using toilet
(Thanks to John Lobert)
THAT'S ONE WAY TO HANDLE IT
Student 'phones in bomb hoax on parents' easyJet flight to stop them visiting him'
(Thanks to pharmaross)
NAKEDNESS IN THE NEWS
Woman arrested for dancing naked in Waffle House parking lot
Woman shares photos of her naked hikes to make exes 'jealous' (NSFW)
(Thanks to pharmaross)
National nudist group selects Idaho site for annual convention
(Thanks to Craig Roberts)