HOW RIDICULOUSLY COLD IS CHICAGO?

Chicago Is So Ridiculously Cold That the Railroad Tracks Need to Be on Fire to Keep the Trains Moving

(Thanks to Steve K, who asks "What could possibly go wrong?")

Seriously folks, stay warm out there. 

Comments

[ImNotDave]

Politicians aged seventy-five+ will be certified as 'kindling' until the weather returns to normal

[Not My Usual Alias]

I used to ride into that station— the smudge pots are like what are used for fruit trees in some climates. My perception is that they have fewer problems with switches than Union Station

I was looking forward to risking my life to get to work, but I was thwarted by the office closing

[PirateBoy]

It was 75 here today. Y'all live in the wrong parts of the country. Plus, you never have to shovel smog.

[Johnny Carson's audience]

"How cold was it?!"

[wanderer2575]

@PirateBoy: I shovel snow and bundle up when it freezes. But I never have to deal with earthquakes, hurricanes, or forest fires. I think I'm in the right part of the country.

[tek]

Yup.

Gas flame heaters for switches have been around since at least the 1920s..

They are a little disconcerting when you see them lit up though..

[Not My Usual Alias]

Groundwater freezing is causing booms

[Jeff Meyerson]

Since nursecindy is not here (huddling under the covers, is my guess), I will *smack* PirateBoy on her behalf.

[padraig the cheesehead]

We need to increase our local temp by 58 degrees before we reach the melting point of ice. I hate science.

[Not My Usual Alias]

Padraig,
Think of it as 238 degrees Kelvin and suddenly it feels warm.

Until you step outside. Then it becomes life threatening in about five minutes, give or take