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August 16, 2018

ALSO TWO COWS WERE ON THE LOOSE

7:28 p.m. Two men named Bob were fighting each other in Kalispell.

(Thanks to Craig Roberts and Roberto)

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10:59 a.m. Trespassers “with an attitude” were allegedly trespassing in Lakeside.

AS opposed to trespassers without one? Please define.

8:52 a.m. A Whitefish woman called 911 looking for a “certificate of good behavior.”

I'll send her one for only $99.99. Order today !

The Le Petomane Institute of Etiquette offers a PhD diploma in good behavior for only $49.95 postage paid.

A baby bumped his head.

6:46 a.m. Two cows — a small one and a big one — were reportedly on the loose in Whitefish. Farmer Joe, the owner of the cows, wanted help getting them back.

Soon to be turned into a #1 hit children's song.

5:37 p.m. Beer cans were strewn about an area road.

6:18 p.m. A car was stuck in the road.

Was the car the source of the beer cans, or was it stuck because there were too many beer cans in the road?

I don't know what y'all's reaction to that headline was, but for me it meant I had to try to remember whether any of my cousins were named after my dad.

When the other brothers of the two Fighting Bobs, also named named Bob, showed up, it was a total melee.

You just never know about Bobs.

Two Fighting Bobs, incidentally, opened for A ship of Fools, and surprisingly, the audience stood and cried at their rendition of "A Horse with No Name."

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