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June 16, 2018

NO SENSE LETTING IT GO TO WASTE

Florida driver chugged can of Busch during DUI stop

(Thanks to Rick Day)

MEANWHILE IN THE NATION'S SOPHISTICATION CAPITAL

Woman shaves her legs on busy train platform

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

SHARKNADO IS *REAL*, PEOPLE

Incredible photos have emerged from China that show octopus and other sea creatures raining from the sky after being sucked out of the ocean by a violent storm.

(Thanks to Le Petomane, Mark Schlesinger, rharvey and John Lobert)

SEND HIM AND THE UNDERPANTS TO WASHINGTON

Czech president torches underpants in stunt that stuns journalists

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

AND STAY OFF HER LAWN

Hart County grandmother kills rabid bobcat with bare hands

(Thanks to Ranald Adams, Emily, Leslie and w, Mark Schlesinger and Corey Smith)

'THEY ONLY EXIST TO HAVE SEX'

Giant sex-crazed moths have awakened - and they are on the prowl for partners

(Thanks to A. Wheeler and John Lobert)

June 15, 2018

A LITTLE LATE

Nigerian man buries his father in a brand new $88,000 BMW SUV to fulfill his promise to buy him a nice car

(Thanks to John Lobert)

AND IN SPORTS

Underwear company slammed for making knickers that vibrate at goals to get women into World Cup

(Thanks to John Lobert)

GUESS THE STATE

Suspected Walmart robber tries to carjack two different cars, both drivers pull out guns

(Thanks to Another Ralph)

LOOK! UP IN THE SKY! IT'S A BIRD! IT'S A PLANE! IT'S... OH S**T

Fierce winds in Commerce City, Colorado were so strong, they picked up two portable toilers and threw them into the air.  One of them soared several stories high.

(Thanks to Michael Moyer and Ralph)

CSI: PEORIA

Who stuck a squirrel under Lydia’s dress?

(Thanks to Ralph)

June 14, 2018

SHE ALSO ALLEGEDLY PERFORMED 'VAMPIRE FACELIFTS'

'Dr. Drop It Like It's Hot' weight loss clinic owner accused of faking medical license

Guess the state.

(Thanks to James Flynn)

WE DON'T KNOW WHO IT BELONGS TO, BUT WE KNOW OF A GUY WHO COULD SERVE IT FOR BRUNCH

Human finger found in snapping turtle, Louisiana police want to know who it belongs to

(Thanks to Gary Schroeder)

'HE ASKED THE DOCTORS IF HE COULD KEEP IT AND THEY SAID YES'

Man has foot amputated after horrific accident - then serves it to his friends at brunch

(Thanks to Le Petomane, who says "If he served it with some fava beans and a nice chianti, I fail to see the problem.")

'GOOD JOB DEPUTY SCOTTEN'

Huge snake slithers out of Texas man's toilet. Deputy wrangles it with her bare hands

Lucky for the Bee County, Texas, man, Vielock was simply cleaning his bathroom, or as a Patch writer put it, "not using it in a way that would have given the blue indigo a tactical advantage."

(Thanks to Bobby Grawl)

WE SAW THEM OPEN FOR THE TROGGS

Five new species of snail-sucking snakes discovered

(Thanks to Jay Brandes)

CUBICLES OF LUST

A new study of 2,000 people found that 14 percent of those polled have actually had sex at their place of work.

(Thanks to coscolo)

WE'RE GONNA NEED MORE SHOT GLASSES

A collision between two tractor-trailers on Interstate 40 in central Arkansas caused at least one of them to catch fire and spilled Fireball whiskey across the highway

(Thanks to Janice Gelb)

THIS ALSO DOES NOT WORK WITH THE IRS

Golisano loses goose poop argument in Canandaigua Lake property tax challenge

(Thanks to Ralph)

FATHER'S DAY

Time to celebrate a special breed of dad: The soccer dad.

WHILE TRYING ON CLOTHES, HE 'RELIEVED HIMSELF IN A WATER BOTTLE HE WAS CARRYING'

Kicked-over bottle of urine at Bloomingdale mall touched off incident that led to 2 people being shot

(Thanks to Steve Heller)

UNCLEAR ON THE CONCEPT

Florida man arrested after asking cops to test his illegal drugs

(Thanks to Jane Linderman)

Related: Kentucky drug dealer mixes up his own number with cop's in a Snapchat message

(Thanks to Gary Schroeder)

Also Sort Of Related: A woman, who works as a stripper, told an officer that she hides pills in her vagina, according to the Palm Bay Police Department.

(Thanks to John Mayson)

June 13, 2018

OOPS

'Dead' husband turns up alive nearly a year after wife given wrong body

(Thanks to Steve K. and Jim Kenaston)

AUSTRALIA CONTINUES TO MORPH INTO FLORIDA

On board the Tigerair flight from hell: Six-hour delays, people throwing rubbish and the police called in to calm down furious passengers... before someone URINATES at the departure gate

(Thanks to Fabian Marson)

WE'RE SURE THERE'S A PERFECTLY LOGICAL EXPLANATION

Woman Rescued After Getting Head Stuck In Truck’s Exhaust Pipe

"It is not clear why...."

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins, Mitch Seibert, coscolo and Matt Filar)

WE HAVE NO DOUBT WHERE THEY WERE HEADED

This is a video of some lawless hellhound in an SUV towing a U-Haul trailer on its side so it's just scraping its way down the highway.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

2018 HERALD HUNT FLASHBACK

Here's an excellent video that was produced by François Dubois. 

STAND TALL, GAS CITY

Mama Pearson's Soaporium in Gas City made an attempt at the world's largest bath bomb Saturday.

(Thanks to MOTW)

JUST A BEER FOR US, THANKS

NH distillery has new bourbon flavored by beaver secretions NH distillery has new bourbon flavored by beaver secretions

(Thanks to Tim! Stern, Bill Hudgins, Scott Cramer, Le Petomane, Andrew Mendez and Roberto)

UKRAINE: LAND OF ROMANCE

Raunchy couple risk their lives to have public sex on sloped rooftop of four-storey building

(Thanks to John Lobert)

ATTENTION SHOPPERS

Farmers vie to get dryer balls on Wal-Mart shelves

(Thanks to nursecindy, who says "I had no idea they even sold these at Walmart.")

AFTERWARD THEY HAD 14,000 BEERS

This is a video of 32 stuntmen and women setting the Guinness World Record for most simultaneous full-body burns.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

AUSTRALIAAAAAAAA

Shark Head Stuffed With Cigarette Butts Found Impaled On Fence

(Thanks to Joffre Scott Essley)

MEANWHILE IN THE MILE-HIGH STATE

Colorado school nurses can dispense marijuana.

(Thanks to Kevin Smith, who says "I have a headache, dude.")

THE CASE OF THE DANCING GUN

FBI agent whose gun went off while dancing taken into custody

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, who says "Calling Mr. Language Person.") 

WE'D BE MORE IMPRESSED IF A FORECASTER DID THE CUBE WRONG BUT GOT THE FORECAST RIGHT

Meteorologist Solves Rubik's Cube While She Gives The Weather Report

(Thanks to John Lobert)

WE HAVE ASKED OURSELVES THIS VERY QUESTION COUNTLESS TIMES

Has Meghan Markle been replaced by a robot?

(Thanks to The Perts)

GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS

Man with 'world's biggest penis' says 13.5-inch manhood has destroyed acting career but helped him bed Oscar winners

(Thanks to John Lobert, who says "They all say that.")

June 12, 2018

COMING SOON TO NETFLIX

A lawyer for a New Jersey superintendent accused of defecating daily on a high school football field asked prosecutors to hand over their full surveillance video of the 42-year-old allegedly doing the deed.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

SO WE'LL PUT HIM DOWN AS 'NOT SATISFIED'

A newly-convicted murderer in Florida repeatedly punched his defense attorney after a judge handed down his verdict last Friday.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

FLORIDA AVIATION REPORT

Gator halts plane on runway at Orlando airport

(Thanks to Jane Linderman and Ralph)

ART-BUYING GUYS IN ACTION

Grandad proudly forks out for new painting - but his wife isn't happy when she sees what it is

(Thanks to John Lobert)

THEY HOLD NOTHING SACRED

Shoplifting squirrel caught on camera stealing from store in Disney World's Magic Kingdom

(Thanks to Jon Harris, Dave Kearns, Nelson from Michigan and John Mayson)

PRESENTING: CHAR

The sexiest cow in Britain has been revealed after a gruelling judging process.

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

INCREDIBLY, ALCOHOL APPEARS TO HAVE BEEN INVOLVED

Plane passenger playing with sex doll forces emergency landing

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

SPORTING EVENT OF THE WEEK SO FAR

The Banana-Butt Relay

(Thanks to Matt Filar)

THE DEFENDANT CLAIMED IT WAS SELF-DEFENSE

Woman who sued lawyer for misdirected pasta throw is awarded more than $85K

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins, who says "Misdirected Pasta just got a contract to do Papa John's commercials.")

'WE'RE HEARING REPORTS OF MINOR TEA SPILLAGES'

8 very British reactions to the earthquake in Lincolnshire and Yorkshire

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

ONE LESS MOUTH TO FEED

My husband said ‘it’s me or the pack of rescue dogs’... so he left

(Thanks to Steve K.)

June 11, 2018

MEANWHILE DOWN UNDER

McDonald’s customers claim ‘ridiculous’ new toilet rule is causing them to wet themselves

(Thanks to coscolo)

 
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