WAIT, WHAT?
Feds plan to wipe Gorilla Snot on Giant Mine
(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)
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May 23, 2018
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Whew... I'd misread that at first.
Posted by: Marcel Marceau | May 23, 2018 at 02:43 PM
We're gonna need a bigger box of tissue.
Posted by: wanderer2575 | May 23, 2018 at 02:43 PM
Wouldn't poutine work just as well?
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 23, 2018 at 03:14 PM
Abby: It's snot.
McGee: Not what?
Abby: Not not, it's Snot.
McGee:OK Abby, don't get upset just tell me what it is.
Abby: I TOLD you, IT'S SNOT! SNOT! snot, snot, snot!
McGee: Oh, why didn't you say that the first time?
(Abby Sciuto, we miss you)
Posted by: ImNotDave | May 23, 2018 at 03:18 PM
Ah. At first I read "Giant MIME," and thought, "Good."
Posted by: Rudolph | May 23, 2018 at 03:39 PM
It's all for naught, I cannot knot.
Posted by: TRew | May 23, 2018 at 03:40 PM
Beware the cheap, imitation competing brand, Ape Sh!t.
Posted by: Skeeter Butts | May 23, 2018 at 04:16 PM
Gorilla Snot is brought to you by Red-Shirt Harvesters™ LLC.
Posted by: MOTW | May 23, 2018 at 04:20 PM
This is, of course, just one more reason to avoid CANADA, a nation descending into environmental chaos, since Yellowknife is firmly located north of the border. So, this isn't our feds- it's theirs. Explains a lot.
Posted by: C. Robbin | May 23, 2018 at 04:40 PM
Gorilla Snot’s manufacturer says its product’s “unique surface crust remains light and flexible yet strong and durable resulting in long-term performance capable of withstanding intense environmental conditions,” claiming it will not wash off with rain.
The ladies melt when you booger talk them.
Posted by: Slim Chance | May 23, 2018 at 06:18 PM
The owners of Gorilla Snot, Inc. are pleased to announce
that over 200 currently out of work gorillas with allergies will be employed for the several years to produce the required amount of snot. Trickle down economics will also benefit banana producers.
Visitors, however, are advised to stay a minimum of three miles from the mine site for reasons of health.
Posted by: Le Petomane | May 23, 2018 at 07:32 PM
I went to Yellowknife a few times. It is way north, but not quite in the Arctic yet. Besides the gold mines, there are also diamond mines - giant holes digged in the permafrost. Only a few years ago they made a paved road to Yellowknife, before that a lot of supplies was getting there during winter, on ice roads across the frozen lake.
Posted by: Qaz | May 23, 2018 at 09:00 PM
Gorilla Snot flows freely if the gorillas have been huffing Gorilla Glue.
For maximum production, the gorillas maintain a regular cycle of one month of snot harvesting with two months of rehab.
Posted by: Slim Chance | May 23, 2018 at 09:23 PM
Use a tissue, feds. It's a lot more sanitary.
Posted by: funny man | May 24, 2018 at 11:39 AM
Wait, so the Canadians are mining giants now?
Posted by: ChrisinVa | May 24, 2018 at 01:09 PM
I saw Gorilla Snot warming up for Metallica back in '98. Helluva show.
Posted by: Alien8 | May 24, 2018 at 04:44 PM