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May 07, 2018

IF YOU READ ONLY ONE WEDDING ANNOUNCEMENT TODAY

Make it this one.

It's difficult to pick a highlight, but consider: "The bride is manager of the SPAM® Museum in Austin, Minn."

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins)

Comments

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I have some Spam I could donate to the museum. It's still in its un-opened can, probably 5 years old. I bought it when I was planning to go camping one day. I did not go, since I changed my mind. Last time I did go camping was in 1987. But I will go one day, someday...

The wedding planner must have had a degree in poncy name construction.

This calls for a SPAM headline:

[b]You'll think he's marrying up. The conclusion will shock you.[/b]

I'd be interested to see the BYPRODUCTS of this union.

I'm glad they used an actual ORGANist. Be a shame to use CANNED music at such an event.

And I wonder what was served at the reception.

Wow. She's keeping her last name? Just think if they have a baby it could be named:
Tiffany Collins de Montenay FitzAlan de Dinan Lord-Johnson. That poor kid will never be able to spell it's last name.
Were the guests treated to a showing of Spamalot after the service?

"She is descended from the English baron Foulques FitzWarin, who was at the Magna Carta"

Pfft. So what? You can't swing a dead cat around here without hitting a descendant from the Magna Carta signing.


@Cheesewiz and @nursecindy:

Agree and would like to see them combine and hyphenate ALL of their names to ensure they are regularly misspelled and mispronounced.

She likes Spam Spam,sausage,Spam,Spam,Spam,Spam,bacon,Spam,tomato and---Spam, lovely wonderful Spam!

He likes Chinese
Rice without Spam, lovely Spam
Egg rolls without Spam,lovely Spam

Soon he will learn to love Spam, lovely spam
Or eat egg rolls and rice without Spam, lovely Spam
Living in his car with no Spam, lovely Spam

I DON'T LIKE SPAM

It'll never fit on a vanity license plate.

A spring honeymoon is planned.

The announcement failed to mention if guests should bring Spam or Hormel or Vegan products to the nuptuals.

The attack of 4, 5 and 6 name serial killers.

In accordance with our strict policy we will not mention that "Harold Pysher was the organist."

Am I the only one who giggled at the mention of the Infirmary Ball?

@MOTW - Well then, you could try the SPAM egg sausage and SPAM...It's not got much SPAM in it.

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