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October 28, 2017


Americans 'are not properly cleaning their anuses'

(Thanks to Craig Roberts)


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"We have a couple of the country's leading Dermatologists here in our studio to discuss the proper way to clean your anus."

"Dr., would these eyeglass cleaner pads do in the absence of a handy wet wipe."

"Yes, also an alcohol pad would work, got any gum?"

I'm pretty sure I don't want to read that article.

Go here to take care of that:


I got some turpentine and a bottle brush if anyone needs help.

Uranus or mine?

Will.i.am is an obvious expert in this subject. I mean, ever listen to his c$ap music?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips.

Must we talk about that planet ?

Home Depot has an end-of-season sale on pressure washers.

Captain Kirk Toilet Paper always gets rid of all those annoying Klingons.

Not buying expensive products, or steam-cleaning mine, sorry. And, modern TP may not be perfect, but it sure beats Sears catalogs and corn cobs.

Perhaps the cleaning element requires more lubrication?

This isn't a problem in Washington, everyone knows it's full of ass wipes.

It takes alot of elbow grease to get a good spit shine.

OK, now we have a problem. If millions of people start using wet-wipes, most of them will get flushed down the toilet.
They are not supposed to be flushed because they don't disintegrate in the sewer like T.P. does. Soon the sewers will all be clogged. Then you'll be sorry.

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