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August 23, 2017

PARATROOPERS WERE ALSO STANDING BY

Seven police storm 73-year-old woman's house to seize her 'dangerous' Yorkshire terrier 'Alfie' after he 'chased delivery man and made him fall over'

(Thanks to Roberto)

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Reflections of Morticia Adams and Spot.

Took the delivery guy five days to report the "incident".
One to recover from the severe trauma, and four to finish binge-watching "Dance Moms".

If only the courier had had some dried haggis to give (gag) the dog (with)...

Dried Haggis...never leave home without it. _UK Food Council

Follow. But! Follow only if ye be men of valor! For the entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so foul, so cruel, that no man yet has fought with it... and lived! BONES of full fifty men lie *strewn* about its lair! So! Brave knights! If you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth!

Well done, Airedale (Some call him "Tim")...

Let me pass the hat around to gather funds for that football team who taught the would-be car-jacker a lesson .. fly them over to teach this courier a thing or two about what it means to be afeared of something truly dangerous.

He's got huge, sharp... er... He can leap about. Look at the bones!

What's he going to do? Nibble your bum?

The deliveryman, never one to run from a fight, has spent hours on Craigslist trying to buy a Holy Hand Grenade.

"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds."

Except for yippee dogs. We can't handle yippee dogs.

Everyone has beaten me to the Monty Python jokes.

Smithers, release the ants.

A Møøse once bit my sister.

A French poodle would have farted in their general direction.

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