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June 24, 2017

FLORIDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Serial mailbox destroyer wreaks havoc on neighborhood (Autoplay)

Villager who said she drank wine at community pool arrested after wild ride in golf cart

Florida contractor fakes death to dodge angry homeowners

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, funny man and Jim Kenaston)

Comments

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Wait, I think Carl Hiassen used the dead contractor plot twist.

As you said, Dave, Florida seniors aren't your state's seniors.

And that contractor needs to be in jail. In Texas, he would be dead.

Florida: America's Haunted House and Disneyland, in more ways than twenty!

Later at couples workshop.

Therapist, "Now Demetrics what have you done lately to show your affection toward Ms. Falana?"

Demetrics, "I left my shoe in her mailbox."

Ms. Falana, "the week before He left his dirty socks in my mailbox."

Demetrics, "you know you like it."

Therapist, "well, see we are making progress. Demetrics just needs some positive reinforcement. Without it He could, through hurt and yearning for your affection, hurl a silver scooter through the neighbor's front window and take a shower down the street in an unknowing homeowner's shower."

Ms. Falana, "can you get Sigmund Freud in here to explain to Demitrics my super ego is sending a strong message to get him the hell out of my life?"

Therapist, ""take it easy on him you b@tch, He was only trying to see her, make a point and reconcile."

I'm outraged that the contractor even made his own daughter think that he died.

Isn't John Travolta a proponent of Demetrics?

What?

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