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September 23, 2016

IT WAS RELEASED AFTER PRODUCING A VALID FLORIDA DRIVER'S LICENSE

A crab has being filmed in Brazil clutching a kitchen knife in its claw while scuttling along a tiled floor and waving the knife around aggressively.

(Thanks to Geoff Scott)

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Coming soon to the SyFy Channel, I hope.

I saw the Knife-Wielding Crabs open for The Beastie Boys.

If it keeps waving the knife like that it's going to pull a mussel. Hiring a lawyer to get an an escape claws might be preferable, but it's probably too shellfish to take anything out of the bank.

And this didn't take long.

Meanwhile, a dog in Colorado grabbed a paring knife from the kitchen counter and accidentally slashed its mistress.

" Shanked By a Crab " opened for the Stones at Altamont in '69.

Ready to rumble with the Sharks?

Aggressive Knife-Wielding Crabs have yet to be classified by the CDC. Threat or dinner?

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