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April 27, 2016

ATTENTION, REWRITE

Man shot with machete in DeKalb County

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Back in my newspaper days, the editor would have fired me using both a gun and machete. Are editors becoming an endangered species nowadays?

I bet it was one of those assault machetes, too.

The editor needs 40 lashes. Then fire him.

Editor missing in DeKalb County.

Officer is ok machete wielding man is dead police say chicken is loose

How about some puncTUAtion?!

It might have been THIS...

Are you SURE the chicken is "loose"? Maybe it's just really friendly.

A poem I used to recite to me kids:
One bright morning n the middle of the night,
Two dead boys got up to fight.
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other.
A deaf policeman heard this noise
And came to shoot the two dead boys.
If you don't believe my story is true,
Ask the blind man; he saw it too!

hA flukey! did the blind man's saw have teeth ?

My Saturday Night Machete Bill would have prevented this.

I shot the sheriff .. but I did not use a ma-che-te.

*Snork @ MOTW*

No. 1 with a bullet.

Instead of guns, we need to regulate machetes...and bullets.

How many machettes can you fire off in 60 seconds?

I can sympathize; I once brought a Nike to a gum fight. Actually I'm still there. I can't move from the pavement.

All the words are there. Some assembly line required.

Suzy could should you with a machete and catch the ricochet in her teeth. She is that good.

After that he was beheaded with a pistol.

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