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January 27, 2016

IOWA UPDATE

Here you go.

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Gee, Dave, I'm coming to Florida and you leave the state.

Coincidence or do I need to sue you and/or fire Judi?

On behalf of the state of Illinois (Motto: We Can Tax That), have fun over there. We have really no idea what happens in Iowa, except corn.

Do they have free samples?

Of bacon, not manure. Or maybe corn. Alcohol?

Dave:
As a fan of yours I beam with pride that Grand Forks named a sewage lift station in your honor. But now that you are in the pork-ethanol state I beg you to NOT allow Iowa to sully your name by naming an ethanol plant after you.

Are the gatherings allowing journalists to candidate tip?

What happens in Iowa...They will come.

Megan Kelly is a bimbo, but she sure is nice to look at. I will not be watching the debate because she is a good looking, very poor reporter/host. I agree with Donald, a man I have met before, Rosie O'Donnell is a pig. So is any news host who works for MSNBC, a network I stpped watching after the 2000 election. I am ready to win. I plan on winning a lot because I am a citizen of this once great country. I hope someone can make this country great again. If Roger Ailes reads this blog entry I want to say, "pffffffffffffffft." Loser.

Dave is so up to speed regarding this election. Maybe I can introduce you to Don someday. Oink.

Dave Barry For President!

President of what?

(All together now...)

Iowa also manufactures hay. Let's not forget that.

The answer to Iowa's position is presidential election politics is given by their interest in Manure Applicator Training Sessions.

We can only hope that the Manure Applicator Training Sessions are outdoors, because you know that that's where the news will take Dave.

i thought 'mr. language person' might be interested in the *real* meaning of 'Des Moines'

From the French name of the nearby Rivière des Moines, which means "river of the monks" and has traditionally been interpreted as a reference to the Trappist monks who settled along it. "It is more likely, however, to be a name of Native American origin, recorded in a 1673 text as moinguena", which recent research has interpreted as Miami mooyiinkweena ‎(“shit-face”), a derogatory designation the Peoria tribe used for their Moingona neighbors.

heh-heh

Has anyone ever actually met someone from Iowa? When you live in Florida, no one is originally from here, but no one is from Iowa either. Most are from Ohio. That state must be nearly empty by now.

I did meet someone from Nebraska recently, so that state must be nearly empty as well.

Isn't Iowa a mythical land, famous for the set/locale of H.R.Puffnstuff?

Dave, I really wish you would make another run for president and consider Kinky Friedman for a running mate. There is something about a Barry/Kinky ticket that has just screams WINNER!

They also make farm tractors, windows, and Blue Bunny ice cream in Iowa. And it was the home of Glenn Miller, John Wayne, and James T. Kirk. Or will be.

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