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January 30, 2015

YOU ARE NOW FREE TO POUND ON THE DOOR

Pilot Locked Out Of Cockpit In Flight From MN To Las Vegas

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)

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What are the odds of that?

Pretty good on that flight.

Surely you can't be serious.

Knock Knock

Who's there?

Pilot

Mr.Pilot?

No,just plane pilot

"Excuse me, sir? Can you come with me to the cockpit?"

"The cockpit? What is it?"

"It's a little room in the front where they fly the plane, but that's not important right now. The captain needs someone to help with the radio."

Amusing when you consider thaat 3 Delta co-pilots were talking just last week about how if the pilot in question told his story about that weekend in Thailand one more time they were going to lock him out of the cockpit when he went to the bathroom.

" This is your pilot speaking. We're cruising at about 35,000 ft at a speed of 600 mph. On our right is Rapid City. I'm standing in front of you telling you this because I'm locked out of the cockpit. Have a safe and pleasant journey. "

*smooches PirateBoy*

Door jam?

Or door jamb?

Or toe jam?

Pajamas?

Should've gone potty before the plane left.

Either that or he went below to the cargo hold to watch a gladiator movie.

Master and Commander – The four stages of a captain's humiliation

Stage 1 – Confidence, Swagger and Disappointment: Having properly zipped-up, the Captain returns to the "front office." Confidently nodding in the general direction of the passengers, he arrives at the cockpit door only to find that it won't unlock. At first he has impure thoughts about the First Officer. "Alright, smartass, open the !@#$%^& door!"

Stage 2 – Al Haig Mode: The Captain begins to fully appreciate his predicament. He picks up the cabin interphone handset mostly in an effort to appear that he is still in control and doing something important. Unfortunately, the First Officer is flying the plane and really doesn't have a lot of time to chat with the now superfluous Captain. The passengers, unable to decide whether to laugh or cry, actually do both.

Stage 3 – Denial: Although no one is on the other end, the Captain maintains his death grip on the interphone handset and pretends to be issuing commands. His back is turned to the passengers, who are now doubled over in laughter.

Stage 4 – Abject Humiliation: With the aircraft now descending for landing, the senior flight attendant gently nudges the Captain to a seat, where he buckles his seatbelt and prepares for the landing of his airplane, surrounded by poorly stifled laughter. Naturally, the First Officer makes the smoothest landing of his career.

Locked myself out of the house yesterday but luckily the house is securely anchored to the ground. Wouldn't normally be a problem as we usually keep a spare key in the garage, but I gave it to our son who's at university (so loses stuff on a regular basis) and not too concerned about it's loss as it's probably being kept company by the spare key to his car which he lost also. Well, it's technically our car, but not going there.

*"borrows" the Geezer Bus and drives over (with Under and Dunne) to pick up PirateBoy*

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