IT'S TIME TO PANIC
Kraft recalls some Velveeta, saying not enough preservative
(Thanks to Jay Brandes and bcduval)
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June 20, 2014
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I have Velveeta from 1978 on the shelf with my Twinkies. Are you saying it's not still good?
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 20, 2014 at 09:49 AM
I remember a lie I often tell of being a kid and eating a brick of Velveeta and smoking a box of cheap cigars and not lying under the kitchen table feeling constipated and sick as a dog for several hours.
Thank in advance.
Posted by: manual tomato | June 20, 2014 at 10:24 AM
Good times, eh?
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 20, 2014 at 10:41 AM
You mean the Cheese That Will Not Die is feeling poorly?
Posted by: Steve | June 20, 2014 at 10:55 AM
Who knew building materials needed preservatives ?
Posted by: El Greco | June 20, 2014 at 12:11 PM
Just add a few more jalapenos before meltin it. Problem solved !
Posted by: LeDud | June 20, 2014 at 12:39 PM
You mean you are supposed to eat that crap?
Posted by: Riverview Dude | June 20, 2014 at 12:50 PM
I once had a friend (He's now in jail, long story..) who "liberated" several bricks of government-issued cheese. Somehow, one of these wound up being given to me. Let me tell you, Velveeta was like a fine wine compared to this stuff! You had to consume your mac and cheese while it was still very hot, otherwise, the cheese "clotted" so hard, you literally couldn't get your fork out of the bowl. It would set up in mid-stir.
I swear I am not making this up.
Posted by: PirateBoy | June 20, 2014 at 01:13 PM
PirateBoy that's what we call "rib-sticking" food.
Posted by: nursecindy | June 20, 2014 at 01:19 PM
NurseCindy: That too shall pass, eventually! ;)
Posted by: PirateBoy | June 20, 2014 at 01:44 PM
A more accurate headline.
Posted by: Ralph | June 20, 2014 at 03:04 PM
You know what else doesn't have enough preservative? Awwwdrey.
I'm watching the rebroadcast of "24" tonight, and she's looking pretty wooden. Acting pretty wooden, too...
Posted by: Wes S. | June 20, 2014 at 09:55 PM
Not to get too philosophical, but if a "cheese" that comes in a box doesn't have enough preservative, can it even be called Velveeta?
Posted by: Gargoyle Socks | June 20, 2014 at 10:04 PM
Garg...I believe the proper term is VelveetaStyle CheezLike Food Substance (insert your own random registered TM bugs, quotation marks, and asterisked explanatory biochemical and legal clarifications)
Posted by: Betsy | June 20, 2014 at 10:27 PM