24
Here is where we stand;
President William Devane is dead. At least we think he is. Evil Terrorist Mom shot him with a missile in Wembley Stadium, which is usually fatal. But bear in mind that back in Season 5, he drove a car off a cliff, and that wasn’t fatal. Also, characters on 24 tend to have remarkable healing properties, although it seems unlikely that this will happen to President Devane, who is now apparently in several million tiny pieces.
Or is he? There are rumors on the Internet that his death was faked somehow -- that maybe he was actually a hologram, possibly created at the last second by Chloe, or that Chloe manipulated the drone camera. And if we can’t believe Internet rumors, what CAN we believe?
In any event, Jack Bauer wants PAYBACK, baby. No more Mister Only Mildly Psychotic Guy. We are very excited about this.
Meanwhile in the mole plot, that guy whom Navarro sent out to get killed might not actually be dead. This is probably very important but we have no idea why.
Agent Kate Morgan continues to be a vital plot element.
Edgar is still dead.
We will be posting updates here as events warrant. Stay tuned in the comments afterward, when the Amazing Steve will make everything clear.
UPDATE: OK, at the moment our cable is not working. We are not going to name our cable provider, which rhymes with Fomcast. All we will say is that WE CURRENTLY HAVE NO CABLE SERVICE FOR WHAT FEELS LIKE THE 337TH TIME, although to be fair it is probably only the 334th. But in any event, if we don't get our service back, obviously we will not be joining you live tonight. This may mean that, rather than forego our commentary, FOX will simply not broadcast tonight's episode. We sincerely apologize. Your call is important to us.
UPDATE: OK, we definitely do not have cable tonight. So we will just do what people did in the olden days, when they did not even have TV: We will slit our wrists.
UPDATE: So I gather from the comments that President Devane is not dead. Good! Except now there will be more Audrey.
UPDATE: So I gather from the comments (SIGFTC) that there was a perimeter. Perimeter! Actually, this is not a bad way to watch the show.
UPDATE: SIGFTC that Jack just threw somebody out a window and I MISSED IT.
UPDATE: SIGFTC (thanks, Jeff Meyerson) that Jack threw Margo AND Ian from the window. So I assume they're dead, but who the hell knows?
UPDATE: SIGFTC that nobody gets the Sprint ads.
UPDATE: SIGFTC that not a lot of actual stuff is happening.
UPDATE: SIGFTC that Chloe kissed whatshisname and ew.
UPDATE: So I finally watched this episode. Whoa. Excellent Jack action.
We have a perimeter
Posted by: Brian rutherford | June 23, 2014 at 09:19 PM
perimeter!
Posted by: Trent | June 23, 2014 at 09:19 PM
Is it me or is Adrian wearing lipstick?
Posted by: MareBear | June 23, 2014 at 09:19 PM
Perimeter! Drink! Shooting! Drink! Mayhem! Drink!
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:19 PM
Bad guys can't shoot.
Posted by: Cheesewiz | June 23, 2014 at 09:19 PM
Margot has a perimeter! And hers seems to be pretty deadly!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:19 PM
Wait a minute- terrorists can set up perimeters too? I'm SO confused!
Posted by: rockin01 | June 23, 2014 at 09:20 PM
How did Jack get from Wembly to Hackney in 5 minutes?
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:20 PM
GO JACK!!
Posted by: Siouxie | June 23, 2014 at 09:20 PM
Jack's missing his Bag o' Death....uh oh!
Posted by: Trent | June 23, 2014 at 09:20 PM
It'd would be really bad for Chloe's PC to have to install Windows Updates right now. Just say in'.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:21 PM
Jack Bauer from above
Posted by: homeybeef | June 23, 2014 at 09:21 PM
Where is the tactical package.
Posted by: Brian rutherford | June 23, 2014 at 09:21 PM
Blood! Chest shot.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:21 PM
Substation down!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:21 PM
Grenade,
Posted by: Cheesewiz | June 23, 2014 at 09:21 PM
Fifth floor, middle suite.
Don't we have any drones of our own?
And is the sucker still in prison?
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:22 PM
Dave's not here!
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:22 PM
protocol!
Posted by: Trent | June 23, 2014 at 09:22 PM
good one, Andy
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:22 PM
We have a door forcing!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:23 PM
Nice family
Posted by: Cheesewiz | June 23, 2014 at 09:23 PM
Has the boy learned nothing? Mom doesn't like it when children misbehave.
Posted by: MareBear | June 23, 2014 at 09:23 PM
Now Ian learns what his sister found out.
Mom is bat sh!t crazy.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:23 PM
I shot one kid. I'll shoot my othrr
Posted by: Brian rutherford | June 23, 2014 at 09:23 PM
It's not nice to disobey your mother, Ian.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:23 PM
I wonder how Missing Pinkie is doing?
Posted by: Pat F. | June 23, 2014 at 09:23 PM
They will succeed or die together for
MahmoudManilow.Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:24 PM
Jacks going spiderman
Posted by: Brian rutherford | June 23, 2014 at 09:25 PM
I love you like I loved Simone. Well, maybe I loved her more, just a finger's worth.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:25 PM
Where's the RAF!
Posted by: Cheesewiz | June 23, 2014 at 09:25 PM
Terror Mom has to be THE worst mother in the world!
Posted by: BevFromNYC | June 23, 2014 at 09:25 PM
Die Hard Jack! Here he goes off the side of the building...
Posted by: Trent | June 23, 2014 at 09:25 PM
I Think This Family Put The "Fun" In Dysfunctional.
Posted by: val1224 | June 23, 2014 at 09:25 PM
SpiderJack! SpiderJack!
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:25 PM
Wonder how Missing Pinky is doing these days?
Posted by: Pat F. | June 23, 2014 at 09:25 PM
Rappelling Jack!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:25 PM
WHOA. Falling Ian!
Posted by: Pat F. | June 23, 2014 at 09:26 PM
Thanks, Ian, for making it easier for Jack to comein and kill you,
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:26 PM
Yea!
Posted by: Trent | June 23, 2014 at 09:26 PM
Ian gets an owie.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:26 PM
Maraan!
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:26 PM
Peekaboo!
Posted by: MareBear | June 23, 2014 at 09:26 PM
Shoulder = thigh?
Posted by: homeybeef | June 23, 2014 at 09:26 PM
YAY Jack!
Posted by: Siouxie | June 23, 2014 at 09:26 PM
Jack just killed 3 schools of fish!
Posted by: Trent | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Season over?
Posted by: homeybeef | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Jack hates fish.
Posted by: Pat F. | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Jack thigh-shot the Thames!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
LOL out the window.
Posted by: Siouxie | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Darnit! There was a chance to target parliament.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
OMG!!!!!
Posted by: kleeeper | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Now. Jacks back
Posted by: Brian rutherford | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Double splat
Posted by: Cheesewiz | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Flying! We're flying!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Day-Um, Jack!
Posted by: rockin01 | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Why didn't you blow up the Houses of Parliament, Jack?
Double defenstration!
*drinks*
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Ok that was the most Jack Bauer thing Jack Bauer has ever done
Posted by: homeybeef | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
She really fell for Jack.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
I need a drink.
Posted by: Ednamode | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
OMG!
Posted by: Melanie | June 23, 2014 at 09:27 PM
If anyone asks, she tripped.
Posted by: MareBear | June 23, 2014 at 09:28 PM
DD @ Jeff!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:28 PM
I cannot believe Dave missed that scene.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:28 PM
GROAN at thc.
Posted by: Pat F. | June 23, 2014 at 09:28 PM
There are 10 episodes so one more left, right?
Posted by: Siouxie | June 23, 2014 at 09:28 PM
Anyone ever here of defenestration? That's what we got here. Classic!
Posted by: maryd | June 23, 2014 at 09:29 PM
Ohhhh baby! Must have reminded Jack of Nina! That, or he decided to have a shotgun Red Wedding.
Posted by: Jesme | June 23, 2014 at 09:29 PM
Jack understood the gravity of the situation.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:29 PM
Dave - so sorry you are missing this. Best episode yet!
Posted by: Melanie | June 23, 2014 at 09:29 PM
Hey Dave! You won't believe what Jack did using this one weird trick! Twice!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:30 PM
This Jack Is So Much Better Than "Nervous Breakdown Jack" In Season 8!
Posted by: val1224 | June 23, 2014 at 09:30 PM
OK, three hours left after this and what is there to do other than get Navarro and Mark?
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:30 PM
I meant "hear". Crummy auto correct...
Posted by: maryd | June 23, 2014 at 09:30 PM
Next, it's time to defen Navarro and what's his bloke, right?
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:30 PM
Best Jack move yet…sing with me Out the window you must go, you must go, you must go!
Posted by: Cynwes | June 23, 2014 at 09:31 PM
So.....President Devane gets kidnapped by the mole (Russians?), and it's up to Jack to rescue him during the remaining 3.5 hours???
Posted by: Trent | June 23, 2014 at 09:31 PM
The next 2.5 hours is Jack sleeping.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:31 PM
Does the Vice President (whoever he or she might be) know WTF is going on tonight?
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:32 PM
Oops...
Posted by: Trent | June 23, 2014 at 09:32 PM
Yeah just end the season now. Unless Jack is going to throw Audrey out of a window,it's not going to get any better.
Posted by: homeybeef | June 23, 2014 at 09:33 PM
molesssssss are next!
Posted by: kleeeper | June 23, 2014 at 09:33 PM
We're getting ready to head back.
Navarro is next.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:34 PM
Subplot!
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:34 PM
Now for the mole section of the show...
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:35 PM
Remember season 2? The bomb went off half way through the season and then it was 12 hours of conspiracies and moles? Yeah, lets do that again -_-
Posted by: homeybeef | June 23, 2014 at 09:35 PM
Dave, Jack threw Ian AND Margot from the same window. And they landed side by side.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:35 PM
'I'm sure if the circumstances were reversed u wuld have done the same thing.'
'um, no, not really'
[!!]
Posted by: SigBauer | June 23, 2014 at 09:35 PM
Mole hunt
Posted by: Brian rutherford | June 23, 2014 at 09:36 PM
Navarro is so screwed.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:36 PM
Crazy analyst Jordan had two bodies! And they're both dead!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:36 PM
Navarro is going to sell out his country even more.
Scumbag.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:37 PM
He wants an override on the override.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:38 PM
Navarro should call Uber. They're faster and don't charge nearly that much!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 23, 2014 at 09:38 PM
*pants from all the heinzing*
Dang, Dave. FIVE????? That was just uncalled for. Please don't take your anger at Fomcast out on us. *sobs*
Gee. Mark doesn't look like he's too happy to see Heller.
Posted by: Diva | June 23, 2014 at 09:38 PM
Okay, I hate the Sprint ads, but like the Gordon character....
Posted by: Trent | June 23, 2014 at 09:39 PM
If none of the moles on the show have moles, I'm going to be highly disappointed.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:39 PM
Who do we hate more - Gor-don or the stubbly pretentious Lincoln guy?
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | June 23, 2014 at 09:39 PM
RIP Jordan. We hardly knew you.
Posted by: Ednamode | June 23, 2014 at 09:40 PM
Dave: Chloe hacked the T. Signal to make Jack think they died.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 23, 2014 at 09:40 PM