24
Here is where we stand;
President William Devane is dead. At least we think he is. Evil Terrorist Mom shot him with a missile in Wembley Stadium, which is usually fatal. But bear in mind that back in Season 5, he drove a car off a cliff, and that wasn’t fatal. Also, characters on 24 tend to have remarkable healing properties, although it seems unlikely that this will happen to President Devane, who is now apparently in several million tiny pieces.
Or is he? There are rumors on the Internet that his death was faked somehow -- that maybe he was actually a hologram, possibly created at the last second by Chloe, or that Chloe manipulated the drone camera. And if we can’t believe Internet rumors, what CAN we believe?
In any event, Jack Bauer wants PAYBACK, baby. No more Mister Only Mildly Psychotic Guy. We are very excited about this.
Meanwhile in the mole plot, that guy whom Navarro sent out to get killed might not actually be dead. This is probably very important but we have no idea why.
Agent Kate Morgan continues to be a vital plot element.
Edgar is still dead.
We will be posting updates here as events warrant. Stay tuned in the comments afterward, when the Amazing Steve will make everything clear.
UPDATE: OK, at the moment our cable is not working. We are not going to name our cable provider, which rhymes with Fomcast. All we will say is that WE CURRENTLY HAVE NO CABLE SERVICE FOR WHAT FEELS LIKE THE 337TH TIME, although to be fair it is probably only the 334th. But in any event, if we don't get our service back, obviously we will not be joining you live tonight. This may mean that, rather than forego our commentary, FOX will simply not broadcast tonight's episode. We sincerely apologize. Your call is important to us.
UPDATE: OK, we definitely do not have cable tonight. So we will just do what people did in the olden days, when they did not even have TV: We will slit our wrists.
UPDATE: So I gather from the comments that President Devane is not dead. Good! Except now there will be more Audrey.
UPDATE: So I gather from the comments (SIGFTC) that there was a perimeter. Perimeter! Actually, this is not a bad way to watch the show.
UPDATE: SIGFTC that Jack just threw somebody out a window and I MISSED IT.
UPDATE: SIGFTC (thanks, Jeff Meyerson) that Jack threw Margo AND Ian from the window. So I assume they're dead, but who the hell knows?
UPDATE: SIGFTC that nobody gets the Sprint ads.
UPDATE: SIGFTC that not a lot of actual stuff is happening.
UPDATE: SIGFTC that Chloe kissed whatshisname and ew.
UPDATE: So I finally watched this episode. Whoa. Excellent Jack action.
Hey, who says he can't mix booze and .. uh, what was it? Oh hey, let's have a drink!
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:18 PM
Keep me posted!
Posted by: Ednamode | June 30, 2014 at 09:19 PM
"Now, about that drink..."
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:19 PM
I'm sensing a thigh shooting before too long.
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:19 PM
Ooooooh! Katepossible is going to want more than Navarro's thighs!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:20 PM
Is Navarro going into the Special Room ;)?
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:20 PM
Hello. My name is Kate Morgan. You setup my husband. Prepare to die.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:20 PM
Get 'im, Kate! Give him some payback Jack-style!
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:20 PM
"Let me talk to him."
Posted by: Melanie | June 30, 2014 at 09:21 PM
Just so we're clear--I wasn't asking. Now get me a damned sandwich.
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:21 PM
Jack is SO NICE whe on he's courteous.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:21 PM
Jack trying to be courteous! Bwahahaha. Will Jack cut some fingers off during interrogation?
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:22 PM
You don't want Jack to be courteous. But you really don't want the alternative.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:22 PM
Does this interrogation room have a window handy?
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:22 PM
He does NOT have the Bauer Chest of Doom.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:22 PM
"Ground rules?" You mean, like when Jack has him on the ground?
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:22 PM
Kate likes to watch.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:22 PM
I sense a table will meet Navarro's head soon.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:23 PM
Poor Kate needs a hug.
Posted by: Ednamode | June 30, 2014 at 09:23 PM
Nice lighting on Jack there.
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:23 PM
Jack: Hey, look! We are back to the beginning except you are there and I am here! Let me use your lines and you can look stoic, like I did!
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:23 PM
Navarro is WRONG.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:24 PM
Uh oh, he's being courteous again. This won't end well.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:24 PM
He's got a real death wish, don't he?
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:24 PM
YAY! Finger breaking!
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:25 PM
OHHHHH! I was SO CLOSE! His hand instead of his fingers!
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:25 PM
"immunity's not on the table... but your hand is!"
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:25 PM
It drives me wild when Jack is courteous!
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:25 PM
Jack keeps Navarro posted.
Posted by: Ednamode | June 30, 2014 at 09:26 PM
I think he may have broken a record for interrogation time with Jack. Yes, yes it is! WE HAVE A NEW WORLD RECORD! Two minutes sixteen point five seconds and only a broken hand to show for it! You win, Mr. Navarro!
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:26 PM
GROAN, Ednamode.
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:26 PM
I'm waiting for Shawn Of The Planet Of The Apes.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Jack is a real stickler for courtesy.
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:27 PM
I think "tick-tock" is Jack's trigger word...
Bet he doesn't have a "safe word" 8-)
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:27 PM
Where's Steve? Where's Dave?
Posted by: Melanie | June 30, 2014 at 09:28 PM
Got to give Jack a hand. He always follows the ground rules.
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:29 PM
We're on our own, guys. I say let's drink (more).
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:29 PM
Smack him, Awwwwdrey!
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:30 PM
Awwdrey is emoting again - gawd, will she EVER stop?!?!?!
(no, I don't expect an answer to that)
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:30 PM
Oh, oh, Awwwdrey is going there.
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:31 PM
"Between Jack and *me*", Awdrey - grammar, please!
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:31 PM
Please. End. This. Awwdrey. Scene.
Please. Writers. Please.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:31 PM
Audrey said "between Jack and I."
That's another reason.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:31 PM
Who wouldn't prefer that weasel Mark to Jack?
Posted by: emj's mom | June 30, 2014 at 09:31 PM
I think Mark needs a manicure, if you know what I mean.
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:32 PM
Wow, Awwwdrey has managed to grow a backbone and a 'tude since last episode. Amazing.
...And now dem eeeevil Russkies are putting the squeeze on Mark. Wonder whether they or Awwwdrey will end up taking him out...?
Posted by: Wes S. | June 30, 2014 at 09:32 PM
Kill Mark!!!
Posted by: Ednamode | June 30, 2014 at 09:32 PM
Boris Badenov is not pleased. Neither is his mustache.
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:33 PM
LOL Pat F.
Posted by: Melanie | June 30, 2014 at 09:33 PM
Chloe to the rescue!
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:33 PM
Chloepatra is having second thoughts.
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:33 PM
FINALLY! Somebody has to go pee!
Wait, is this actually 24?
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:34 PM
Mark has a world of hurt heading his way. I can just feel it.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:34 PM
Well! I finally found everybody. What is evil mom up to? Is she still dead?
Posted by: nursecindy | June 30, 2014 at 09:34 PM
Still no real pee, beeeeper. The last time someone peed, someone jammed a screwdriver into his ear.
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:35 PM
Kate's got something for Navarro's pain...
Posted by: Wes S. | June 30, 2014 at 09:35 PM
Hahaha, give me something for the pain that Bauers about to continue to inflict on me.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:35 PM
Yay, Kate!
Smash mole-man's cast to start with...
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:35 PM
Shoot him in the thigh!
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:35 PM
Chloe is going to cause Adrian some hurt.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:35 PM
Good acting, Kate and Jack!
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:35 PM
Jack and Kate make a great "interrogation" team
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:36 PM
Tag-team! Brilliant!
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:36 PM
She out Bauered-Bauer!
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:36 PM
Good cop/bad cop, Jack style!
Posted by: Wes S. | June 30, 2014 at 09:36 PM
KATEPOSSIBLE FOR THE WIN!
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:36 PM
"And I'm going to be there to watch."
Posted by: Melanie | June 30, 2014 at 09:36 PM
and still no pee break
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:37 PM
...And how effed up is is when Jack is the "good" cop in the GC/BC routine?
Posted by: Wes S. | June 30, 2014 at 09:37 PM
Kate must have been switched at birth with Kim Bauer. She has Bauer in her blood!
Posted by: Ednamode | June 30, 2014 at 09:37 PM
Chloepatra better find a taser soon.
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:37 PM
Let's all write in to Fox and ask for the Morgan-Bauer Power Hour show. Guaranteed hit.
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:37 PM
Wes - you mean "bad cop/worse cop"?
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:37 PM
Good catch, beeeep! Chloe may be able to use that fact later.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:38 PM
Why are all the people on cellphone commercials so active? Watching them exhausts me!
Posted by: nursecindy | June 30, 2014 at 09:38 PM
Dave is missing another decent episode.
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:38 PM
Guardian of the Galaxy: Jack Bauer
Posted by: Melanie | June 30, 2014 at 09:38 PM
Pat, you got it! Start the petition now, they couldn't lose...
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:39 PM
So where do you think Discredited Airman ended up?
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:40 PM
Weenie's tour as Acting CIA Chief of Station/London isn't going so hot, is it?
Posted by: Wes S. | June 30, 2014 at 09:40 PM
Pat F., He is now navigating the nucular submarine!
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:40 PM
Perimeter! Drink again!
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:41 PM
Ooooo, Mark just got even more pale and pasty-looking
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:41 PM
Tate's plan is in taters...
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:41 PM
Mark begins to worry just a tiny bit.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | June 30, 2014 at 09:41 PM
...Hey, did they ever let that poor scapegoated airman drone-pilot dude out of the brig? Just curious.
Posted by: Wes S. | June 30, 2014 at 09:41 PM
Russians and hackers and Bauer, oh my!
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:42 PM
Uh oh - Jack is leading the team. What did I do?
Posted by: Melanie | June 30, 2014 at 09:42 PM
Great minds, Wes S...
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:42 PM
I miss Dave.
Posted by: nursecindy | June 30, 2014 at 09:42 PM
Jack Bauer, Advice Counselor
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:43 PM
Me, too, Cindy.
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:43 PM
Jack, you omitted...Killed while you two were doing the wild thang ;).
Posted by: Gennita Low | June 30, 2014 at 09:43 PM
WHOA. The hell?
Posted by: Pat F. | June 30, 2014 at 09:43 PM
@Pat F: Whoops, cross posted.
...Still a good question, though. Of course, they totally forgot about that poor SOB in the wall from a couple of seasons back, too...
Posted by: Wes S. | June 30, 2014 at 09:44 PM
Um, that's not what he was planning on doing with the device...
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:44 PM
OMG, it's THE CHINESE SUBPLOT AGAIN!!!
Posted by: beeeeper | June 30, 2014 at 09:44 PM
Cheng!!!!!
Posted by: Ednamode | June 30, 2014 at 09:44 PM
The Chinese have arrived!
Posted by: Melanie | June 30, 2014 at 09:44 PM
The Chinese was to make a cheap knockoff of the override.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | June 30, 2014 at 09:44 PM