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May 29, 2014


Flatulence can trumpet our good health

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)


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Thursday night is no longer Cruciferous Vegetable night.

"Fourteen farts per day..." Is that waking hours or a full 24-hour cycle? Please be specific, scientist! How am I supposed to know how to count properly?

that new dog food i bought must be d@mn good

I'm gonna live FOREVER!

I'm planning on eating every non-breakfast meal during the three day baseball tournament at Taco Bell so the 3.5 hour ride back can be very healthy.

Put em on a very, very loud public address system.

Beats the "siren test" our government does every Wednesday. This way, people would sit up and notice!

"Your fanny might sound off on your health far more than you know."

The British might have a different reaction to this.

Ya, I got nothing

The news was met with great fanfare.

This is in the Klumbus paper?

Did the "reporter" consider the fact that mudstuffin is frum Klumbus?

What about my borborygmi?

What's the best detergent to remove that "Badge of honor" the reporter refers to?

So we keep on getting healthier and healthier, digestively speaking, until we die?

There's a quota?
And how do you count them? Does a "train-whistle" count more than the "machine gun"?

Pass or fail.

Hydrogen business in the front, sulpher party in the back. It's alimentary, Watson.

The grading levels include:

Fizz, fuzz, fizz-fuzz, fart, buck fart, poot, tally poot and tear-your-ass rattle.

That is all.

i didn't do it.

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