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December 31, 2013

WHO SAYS ROMANCE IS DEAD?

Woman Busted For Attacking Live-In Boyfriend When He Refused To "Cuddle" In Bed

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson and Charles in Orange County)

Woman gets drunk, breaches DV order and defecates on partner

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

Man stabbed after giving girlfriend knife for Christmas

(Thanks to Dave French)

Police say woman set fire to fiance's house on Christmas Day

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Wife Hates Her Christmas Gifts, Torches Husband’s Truck

(Thanks to nursecindy)

Something seems to be bothering women.

Comments

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It's all the holiday stress. We women work our fingers to the bone trying to make everything all nice and merry but do you guys appreciate it? No! The living room can look like a Currier and Ive's print and the guy will still walk in and plop himself down in front of the d@mn TV and never notices there is festive garland everywhere! Does he think it just puts itself up? Sorry. I still have a little holiday stress going on.

I guess the knife lady had her heart set on an iPhone.

nursecindy is right - say 'thank you' or risk retribution (a latin word for 'taking half of everything you own including your private parts).

Dammit.

I think I'll take my Y chromosome and a drink and avoid the lady folk for a few days. (tip toe..tip toe......)

Some things are unforgivable.

"I want spontaneous affection and I want it NOW!!!" cooed Marsha harshly, spittle flying from her luscious yet maniacally contorted lips.

Occasionally it is the other way around as in this story from Florida (where else?).

nursecindy is sort of right, I guess -- I never notice anything in the house. My wife had my birthday present sitting in full view in the living room for a month because she knew I would never see it.

But to Annie, I hastily note that once said present was finally pointed out to me, I thanked her profusely.

No wonder the birth rate is falling like a rock.

Yea, I stay away from the female of the species anymore, the expectations are too high thanks to tv/cable/web. Everyone is a Princess now. Fortunately we keep making young stupid men to feed the fires of passion, or their pick-ups...

My wife: You get up every morning, swing your feet out of bed and face the same curtains we've had for ten years.
What color are they?
Me: Red? Blue? Yellow. They're yellow, aren't they?
(Close. They were green.)
My only redeeming characteristic is that I am the cook in the family.
Sorry to all the ladies.

"She got up. She was a big woman. BIG woman. Her name was Shavonna. Shavoona Rumph.

She was one of the Butt sisters. He didn't care. He looked up at her and said:

Sock it to me sock it to me sock it to me sock it to me sock it to me sock it to me sock it to me sock it to me!"

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