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September 30, 2013

THE SCIENCE IS SETTLED

Saudi cleric says driving risks damaging women's ovaries

(Thanks to Kibby F5, who says "imagine the devastation horseback riding causes!")

Comments

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"imagine the devastation.."

Oh, already said that...

Maybe his head gear, whatever you call it, is too tight.

Driving does not appear to have done the sheik's brain much good.

The damage is explained by the fact that Saudi women don't grasp the gear shift with their hands but with something else, which requires a motion akin to twerking to get from park to drive.

One may hope he gets into a situation where he is injured and only a woman is available to drive him to a hospital.
But I'd settle for hoping he gets a severe injury in the crochal area while, himself, driving.

B) 'Cause camels are just so damn smooth riding.

Now let's' not judge too harshly. Consider what this poor deprived bastard went through to become a Saudi cleric. Here in the land of freedom and tolerance, he could have grown up to be anything. Although realistically, he'd probably have settled for being Mayor of a small town in Louisiana.

Isn't driving a lot less racy than bouncing up and down on a camel ?

Personally, I suspect that it is the sheik who has sagging ovaries, not the lady drivers.

Scientific research seems to go off in different directions in that part of the world:

"In 1981, Abol-Hassan Bani-Sadr, the first president of the Islamic Republic, announced that 'scientific research had shown that women's hair emitted rays that drove men insane.'"

Driving with limited peripheral vision is also hazardous.

oh please. this guy sounds like a teaparty person.

No, no, this is completely true. I based it on research using my Number Two Wife, Lindsay al-Lohaidan, as the female driver.

His touching concern for "children with clinical problems of varying degrees" should start with doing something about the districts in Saudi Arabia where over 60% of marriages are between cousins.

Ernie,

I think he was a result of his momma being his older sister and his dad being his older brother.

So once I'm past child-bearing age, I can drive? Oh, wait. By then, I'm living in the camel shed, mending the garments of more recently acquired wives.

Betsy,

They just take you out in the desert and let you die.

"Well, I'm the Sheik of Araby.
Your love belongs to me.
At night when you're asleep,
Into your tent I'll creep."

The Leon Redbone rendition gives it just the right tone, too. Highly recommended.

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