HE BROUGHT HIS OWN SALAD
Goldilocks intruder broke into home to masturbate, play with toy helicopter
Key Wording: Vickery wasn't cooperative so the deputy escorted him to the ground, the report stated.
Guess the state.
(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)
« Previous | Main | Next »
April 30, 2013
Comments
You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.
The comments to this entry are closed.
-
Oh Goldilocks, you have changed so much since my childhood.
Posted by: Blackberry13 | April 30, 2013 at 01:31 PM
Vickery's attorney will allow Dateline to interview his client as soon as the toy helicopter part of the story has a proper team of toy/psychologists experts in place.
Posted by: manual tomato | April 30, 2013 at 01:32 PM
noticed an unlocked door
How exactly does one "notice" an unlocked door?
Posted by: Layzeeboy | April 30, 2013 at 01:46 PM
The salad was my favorite part, although the wig, the chewing tobacco and the green towel must have made things even more festive.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | April 30, 2013 at 02:46 PM
I was a jailhouse nurse for a few years. I've had to bandage prisoners that were "escorted" to the ground. They usually deserved it though. Heck I wanted to escort a couple of them right out a window.
Posted by: nursecindy | April 30, 2013 at 03:58 PM
I'm sitting on the patio of our St. Augustine home right now.
Looking for bears. If Goldilocks is around, well...
Posted by: Steve | April 30, 2013 at 06:36 PM
G'wan witcha! Ged outa here! Hey, you listenin' to me? I said beat it! NO, not like that! Where's my bolt cutters?
Posted by: Omniskeptic | April 30, 2013 at 10:36 PM
The first helicopter was toooooooo big!
Posted by: Just Some Guy | May 01, 2013 at 10:41 AM
I have friends who call that "foreplay."
Posted by: Marquis de Sade | May 01, 2013 at 12:46 PM