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December 22, 2012


Formal Reprimand Issued To Flatulent Federal Worker

(Thanks to Robert Mathis, Jeff Meyerson coscolo, Unholy Slacker and Peter Metrinko)


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We might as well just shred the First Amendment and be done with it.

Lay off the Brussels sprouts, SSA workers.

The real question now is, will the guy's union file a grievance against Mr Flatulence's supervisors?

Hmmm. Can they demonstrate that none of his co-workers ever cut an onion?

In an early draft of the Bill of Rights, the First Amendment included the phrase "the right of the People to breaketh wind shall not be infringed."

If a bureaucrat was speaking, how could they tell? It's the same from both ends.

Background music for that office: Classical Gas.

“in regards of your releasing of bodily gas in the module during work hours...”

According to Emily Post, all letters to elected officials should begin this way.

I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.

Now go away or Sir Flatus will taunt you again!

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