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November 28, 2012


Man arrested after wild goose found in his SUV

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)


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A no speed wild goose chase?

He told officers he’d removed the bird from its natural habitat at the river near the park, kept it in the car with no food or water, and had "no constructive plan to return the bird to its natural habitat," the report said.

"Yo, we were tired of turkey and wanted something different this Thanksgiving, OK?"

That was a park goose, not a wild goose. You do not want to tangle with a wild one; they can break your arm with their wings and beat you with their beak. And go loosey-goosey all over your SUV.

If he thought it was an emu with butt implants, can we just forget the whole thing?

A key lesson in life: transport the goose to your brother's house and THEN go play soccer.

Or, Plan B, wring the goose's neck then play soccer. Grey Goose would have lost him his license.

On behalf of the Irish diaspora in general, I resent this.

If it was a Canada goose, then they can hardly charge him with "Possession of a migratory waterfowl". Those lumps can hardly fly.

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