THINKING OF VISITING LONDON?

Here's all you need to know.

Comments

[Layzeeboy]

So, you're saying it's just like Miami?

[queensbee]

thanks for this. you can never get enough information about the Picts.

[padraig]

LZ, yes, up to and including driving on the wrong side of the street at high speed.

The only counter we have to that up in Cheeseland is our rural mail delivery people, who generally drive their own cars. Since they have to shove mail into boxes on the right hand side of the street, these carriers acquire the skill of driving from the passenger seat, using only their left hand and foot to actually drive. I think they are taught by amputees.

One of these guys almost took me out on my bicycle. He swerved up an embankment on the right then came right at me. He recovered in time to WAVE at me as he went by. I think that was the scariest part.

[Not My Usual Alias]

Apparently I was sufficiently rumpled to look like a native in my last visit, so I was asked for directions to the nearest phone booth.

As a miracle, I actually knew. When I led the other foreigners there, it turned out that the phone had been vandalized.

"Oh, a Working pay phone. I don't think they exist anymore," I said, much to the chagrin of nearby Brits. Apparently the pay phone situation was a point of national humiliation in the past.

[poker]

Ironically, Winston Churchill was struck by a car while visiting New York in 1931. He looked the wrong way.

[ligirl]

Go easy on dave - he's been hallucinating

[WVplantman]

ligirl - that was a cruel thing to do.

As to Dave's recommendations on tipping, I just want to say that in WV we never tip the sheep as it turns what can be a tender moment into a crass business transaction.

[nursecindy]

WVplantman cow tipping is pretty common here in N.C.
I never know how much to tip anyone and have even asked them how much they want for a tip. I wouldn't last long in London. Another great article Dave!

[DrPat]

Perhaps the "WHAT TO PACK" section explains The Blog's shirt choices...

[Mitch]

A British family returning to London yesterday were delayed by three weeks due to a New York air traffic cancellation. The oldest daughter was a bit anxious about this development since she had tickets to see their women's soccer team play in Birmingham, Alabama on Friday after successfully brokering the return of two teammates who'd been taken hostage by a distraught Brazilian team following a 1-0 loss to England on Tuesday. The terms of the release were not disclosed although rumor has it a very large tip was gratefully accepted.

[Jan in Grimsby]

Every time we go back to visit family and friends in Blightey, my Canadian husband dreads the first few trips in our rental car, as I get re-acclimatised to driving a manual on the left. After 25+ years of riding shotgun while I gun it around the city, he still gets nightmares. Me? I love every minute.

[Elon]

Cindy, do NOT, NOT, NOT visit Israel, They will tell you with a straight face that the average tip is a thousand bucks and that you are supposed to tip gas station attendants, cashiers, clerks, and random people just standing around.

[Clankie]

With that big ferris wheel, London now looks just like Coney Island. Why not just go to Coney Island ?

[Wolfsong]

They call a pound coin "a pound" because that's what it weighs. If you carry a bunch of them in your pocket for tipping random people, you'll list like the tower of Pisa.

[Omniskeptic]

As Gilbert Shelton said about his visit to London, "The first thing you notice is that they drive on the wrong side here. If this is not the first thing you notice, you may not notice anything else."

[Jan in Grimsby]

Just turned on the live feed and Dong Dong is leading his heat!!!!!!

[Emmett Flatus]

I am disappointed that Dave neglected to mention the infamous warning, "Mind the gap."

[padraig]

My local radio station has a trivia question open, "What current Olympic sport was named after an old English estate?"

I'm going to guess "Wapping." Anybody got a better answer?

[Clankie]

" Glutenfart "... ( Or is that a German estate ? )

[Jan in Grimsby]

Badminton.

[nursecindy]

Dorking?

[padraig]

Jan, we're not looking for the REAL answer here. We're looking for the most AMUSING answer. Cheez. What a showoff.

Anyway, they were wrong. "Bad Minton" isn't an estate, it's an English dessert served when you run out of Spotted Dick. Or it's a German spa. Whatever.

[Jan in Grimsby]

OK. How about Cockermouth?

[padraig]

MUCH better.

[Spiny Norman]

But here’s the thing: No matter which way you look, the instant you step out onto the street there will be a car bearing down on you from the other direction. Even if you look in both directions, swiveling your head rapidly back and forth like a hyperactive lawn sprinkler, you will fail to see a car hurtling at you from some previously unnoticed third direction, or even a fourth direction, or even the future. London intersections do not obey the normal laws of the space-time continuum.

Very late to this thread, but I remembered some advice from P.J. O'Rourke on this subject:

Traffic was like a bad dog. It wasn't important to look both ways when crossing the street; it was important to not show fear.

There's your problem, Dave. ; ^ )