CLEANUP ON AISLE 7

Ew.

(This may not be safe for work, but we don't know, because we could not bring ourselves to read it.)

("Thanks" to Jeff Meyerson and Bill Jones, who sent in a link with pictures)

Comments

[poker]

"click to enlarge"
Uh, no thanks

[Dmentd]

Strike while the iron is hot, says I. Apparently, these two also believe in striking *wherever* the iron is hot.
Somewhat relatedly, a former girlfriend claimed to have gotten frisky in a demo tent in the sports department at Sears once. Not with me, unfortunately...I think.

[nursecindy]

I'm beginning to think Walmart pumps 'crazy' gas through their air vents. It's the only reasonable explanation.

[Cheesewiz]

No one offers samples anymore.

[DrPat]

There's the Snooki I expected from clicking on the Tanorexia link...

[ScottMGS]

Walmart have yet to provide comment about the incident though the Hutchinson Police said they had never heard of such a thing happening before.

Someone needs to read this blog more often.

[ligirl]

ya jes never know Where that 'olympic mascot' will pop up next,
slippery devil

[Layzeeboy]

"click to enlarge"

Sounds like she did.

[queensbee]

it was posted on the people of walmart-stories site. ewww. all i read was the headline. that was quite enuf thanks.

[Ernie G]

A recent caption in the "Most Interesting Man" meme:

I don't always think of myself as being at the top of the gene pool ...

But when I do, I'm at WalMart.

[mazar larry]

Drug free- OK, I assume they passed the tests. But this behavior is not sober. Look it up.

[Omniskeptic]

But they're such a nice, intelligent looking young couple!

[Ralph]

So fondling while clothed is illegal in Kansas? And unless they concealed the merchandise, is it illegal to open a product you intend to pay for?

However, if they were blocking the aisle, throw the book at them.

[LeDud]

Is it possible that he was a gynecologist and she a urologist ?

[WVplantman]

*snork* at LeDud. I am wondering who cuffed them (ew) and then how they kept the cuffs from slipping off?

[Dmentd]

"...the Hutchinson Police said they had never heard of such a thing happening before."
The Hutchinson Police were unaware that some people somewhere may have had contact of a sexy-type nature at some time in the past? Ah, well, this is Kansas after all.

[[email protected]]

Earwig Alert: Slip Sliding Away

Slip sliding away, arrested today.
You know the nearer to Aisle 7,
The more they're slip sliding away.

Whoah, I know a man, he came from a cow-town
He wore his pubes across his chin like an ugly crown.
He said that Tina, I live in fear.
That lube you use is so overpowering,
I'm afraid my stink will disappear

Chorus

I know a nut, now awaiting his release
These are the very words he uses to describe his grease.
He said a good lube, it's nice and pale.
He said a bad lube's when I see I my cellmate,
Warming up the tube in county jail.

Chorus

And I know a father who had a son.
He called to tell him he was disappointed
At the crimes he'd done.
He came a long way just to make bail.
But he didn't have enough money,
Who shops at Wal-Mart? Funny!
Then he turned around and left his son in jail.

Chorus

Whoah security only knows, security makes their plans
Using webcams unavailable to the common man
We work at Wal-Mart, collect very little pay
Watching them gliding down Aisle 7,
when in fact the cops are already on the way.

[klezmerphan]

PB, that is BRILLIANT!

I love Paul Simon's songs - but I'm waving my lighter in YOUR direction now.

I always wanted to be a groupie!

*hums along with PB*

[ligirl]

There Goes Rhymin' PirateBoy!

*snorks!*

[LeDud]

Cudos PB. Disturbing but brilliant ! (Lifted from Ron Weasley)

[queensbee]

speaking of which, disturbing but brilliant would be a good name.....
brilliant parody.