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June 27, 2012


Elite secret agents sent to protect France’s new president Francois Hollande at a major overseas meeting forgot to pack their guns, it has emerged.

(Thanks to Emily, Leslie & W)


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It's easier to surrender if you're unarmed.

Clouseau doesn't need a gun.

Stay away from the prostitutes officers.

But France has never had to rely on being unarmed. They were plenty armed in 1815, 1870, 1914, 1940, 1954 ... but they still managed it. I admit there were a few little tactical and technical advantages -- tanks without radios; vast, static, unidirectional defensive positions; uniforms with red pants; Henri Bergson -- but even so, it's an impressive record.

Read "The Day of the Jackal" and put down the French.
Anyone can mess up, but there's still a France.

"The President of France is widely considered to be the second most powerful executive position in the world after the American President."

Wait.... what?

I bet their secret service agents are better at picking up girls than ours. Hell, ours don't even pay up.

Y'know, if it wasn't for Frenchmen like Lafayette and Rochambeau we'd be English.

Wait! We aren't English?!?

I mean, I know I'm not, but ...

sacre bleuuuuu!

They did, however, pack the dressing ("Hollande's sauce").

Back in the 70's the Central African Republic was run by a nutjob named Jean-Bedel Bokassa. Murder, torture, the usual. Finally declared himself emperor. The French took him down in a very slick operation called Operation Barracuda. Napoleon, wherever you are, you should be proud.

Don't diss the French. They're not into suicide campaigns and our fight isn't always their fight, but when you need someone who can fight dirty, they can do it. Vive la France.

"Ah hav eh boom. Jes no gon. Le Poo."

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