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Every time I see a crime report from Kalispell and it doesn't have my cousin's name in it, I count it as a small victory for my clan.
Posted by: padraig | May 31, 2012 at 10:15 AM
In that order? That's just wrong. I'd have started with the boyfriend-urinating.
Posted by: Just Some Guy | May 31, 2012 at 10:38 AM
7:54 p.m. A teenage girl in jammie pants reportedly yelled, screamed and hit a man in a stripped mechanic’s uniform.
Who reported this? The Fashion Police?
Posted by: nursecindy | May 31, 2012 at 10:38 AM
Why is this item dated Thursday 6/23 - have they discovered time travel?
Posted by: Steve Hammond | May 31, 2012 at 11:11 AM
8:56 p.m. A man in Kalispell reportedly poured a beer on his wife, hit her car with his hand and urinated on her boyfriend.
maybe I'm just old fashioned, but while I do not condone urinary contact, alcohol abuse or assault with intent to ding, I must admit that I would probably do much worse if I caught my wife with her boyfriend.
also, they sure grow up fast in Flathead country:
10:31 a.m. A kid on a 4-wheeler reportedly stole items from a Columbia Falls store.
11:01 a.m. A teenaged boy was arrested after stealing a 4-wheeler from a Hungry Horse man.
At that rate by 8:36 p.m. he could have been the man who poured beer on his wife.
Posted by: max | May 31, 2012 at 11:31 AM
I didn't know stripped mechanics had a special uniform. Or, wait ... yes, I guess I did. But I don't want to think about it.
Posted by: Omniskeptic | May 31, 2012 at 12:00 PM
I remember driving through Kalispell on the way to Glacier NP and I have a feeling that if I were stuck there, I'd be tempted to urinate in public too as it's just impolite to hit cars with your hand.
Posted by: Thurberbrigade.blogspot.com | May 31, 2012 at 12:36 PM
I'm still crying about the ignored pony....sob....
Posted by: LeDud | May 31, 2012 at 12:53 PM
A tragic waste of beer.
Posted by: Elon | May 31, 2012 at 01:14 PM
Needs more dogs.
Posted by: Steve | May 31, 2012 at 04:51 PM
I'm thinkin' that stripped mechanic is kinda like stripped threads on a bolt, or stripped gears in a transmission ... not of much use, in either case ...
Posted by: O the Umanity | May 31, 2012 at 08:26 PM
Stripped mechanic’s uniform is an oxymoron.
Posted by: Ralph | May 31, 2012 at 09:58 PM
What kind of unfeeling people ignore a pony? This should be investigated!
Posted by: west coast guy | May 31, 2012 at 10:03 PM
8:52 p.m. A Kalispell man complained that a white horse was outside tearing up his lawn.
I bet he tried to tell him it had a horn on its forehead, too.
Posted by: ubetcha | May 31, 2012 at 10:08 PM
That ignored-pony story is big. The Beacon should be running with it, taking it to all the big-time media outlets.
Posted by: Just Some Guy | June 01, 2012 at 08:43 AM
On the other hand, maybe we shouldn't fan the flames of hate.
Posted by: Just Some Guy | June 01, 2012 at 08:47 AM
Flathead County Cosmo: "Three ways to tell when he REALLY loves you"
Posted by: Betsy | June 01, 2012 at 09:16 AM
7:28 a.m. An employee at an Evergreen gas station complained that a dog with one yellow eye was loitering inside the store.
... the apocalypse starts in Flathead County...
Posted by: Saint Tom | June 01, 2012 at 09:37 AM