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March 30, 2012
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I'm starting to get the feeling that these are all just ideas for some new Coen brothers or David Lynch films.
Posted by: Head_Smashed_In | March 30, 2012 at 05:41 PM
10:04 a.m. A woman in Lakeside reported that her boyfriend kicked her knee and threw things at her. He was last seen wandering down the street in his green turtleneck and sporting what could only be described as “the beginnings of a mustache.”
Sounds like a keeper, lady.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | March 30, 2012 at 05:47 PM
This is where Lenny Briscoe goes for vacation.
Posted by: Clankie | March 30, 2012 at 06:48 PM
Was that kid "hogtied" before they stole his bicycle?
Posted by: O the Umanity | March 30, 2012 at 07:28 PM
The band-themed bike must have been easy to spot, as it was missing an Axl.
Posted by: Pirateboy | March 30, 2012 at 07:29 PM
How exactly does one "inevitably coax" another?
Posted by: Steve | March 30, 2012 at 08:47 PM
8:32 p.m. A Kalispell woman requested assistance in keeping her determined 7-year-old from running in the road.
10:30 p.m. Reportedly, a teenage boy was “hogtied” and thrown into a green car on East Idaho Street.
See, it may take a while, but people are more than willing to help one another in Flathead. We should learn from these civic minded folks!
Posted by: funny man | March 30, 2012 at 11:28 PM
*Snork @PB*
Sounds like you need a lot of "Patience" in Flathead County.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | March 31, 2012 at 08:38 AM
The person who transcribes these is a bit of a mystic, maybe even a poet. "Inevitably coax" is just one example of many phrases supporting my theory that a new literature is emerging in Flathead County, and it's going to turn western culture on its head. Or somebody is just really bored. One or the other.
Posted by: Omniskeptic | March 31, 2012 at 01:36 PM
Okay, Dave. I live in Flathead County and am half thrilled and half horrified when you post these tidbits from our police blotter.
I live one block away from a place called "Del's Bar" (pretty much like it sounds, plus has a drunken mini-golf course) and just noticed on their sign out front that they're having a superhero costume party in April.
I'm guessing that the calls to the police dept. will be a lot of fun that night. You have an open invitation to stay at my house if you'd like to attend.
Posted by: Jodie B Dodie | April 01, 2012 at 02:39 AM
You'd have your choice of an airbed or a waterbed, if that helps. I could probably knit you your own superhero costume to wear. AND I'm a very funny atheist.
Posted by: Jodie B Dodie | April 01, 2012 at 02:57 AM
Notice the hour of Jodie's postings. That bar must be a boisterous place.
What say we encourage Dave to accept the offer? Sounds like there'd be a great article in it.
Posted by: Richard the Weasel-Hearted | April 01, 2012 at 01:26 PM
Ha ha! That's funny. I'm on Mountain time, I think I actually posted that around midnight. But I'm pretty sure there's another Pulitzer in it for Dave if he makes the trip.
Posted by: Jodie B Dodie | April 01, 2012 at 08:21 PM