YOU WILL NEVER GUESS WHAT APPARENTLY WAS INVOLVED

University of Louisiana at Monroe police say a driver stopped for weaving along a main street through campus got out of the car and fell flat on the ground.

(Thanks to bayou girl)

Comments

[Meanie the Blue]

High winds? Blinding sun? Poor footwear?

[Allen at Division]

At LA-Monroe? I'm shocked! Shocked, I tell you...

[max]

A kangaroo? A really bad case of dandruff? The evil glove-box monkey, nah that's too obvious.

[Meanie the Blue]

Uneven pavement? Sunspots? Gravity anomaly? Incoming mortar fire?

[Ms. Flukey]

Looking a a dehydrated lizard on the ground?

[Elon]

No Meanie! Dave obviously is looking for some kind of foodstuff. My money is on the tomato paste.

[Meanie the Blue]

No, certainly not tomato paste at Mardi Gras time. If it was some kind of consumable product around Mardi Gras time, what could that have been?

Aha!!!! He slipped on some gumbo!

[Betsy]

Gravity. I'm pretty sure...

[Betsy]

oops! Sorry, Meanie. I shoulda known you'd get there first.

[O the Umanity]

"Gravity makes all the important decisions"
(John R. Powers)

Yeah, this is a real shocker. A guy in Cajun-land is drunk the morning of Ash Wednesday ... wowser ...

Can I get a cap with a prostrated Cajun, that sez "Mardi Gras, a good time for Praying"

[funny man]

A really bad GPS unit?

Alien abductions?

Ewes?

I give up. Wait...booze?

[ligirl]

You're not drunk if you can lie on the ground without holding on

[O the Umanity]

(ligirl ... see my post on the Irish Puker thread ... neat sign in my favorite Irish Pub ... )

[ligirl]

late to the party, o u - just saw it ;)

(& yes gmta)

[nursecindy]

Was extreme stupidity involved? I agree with Betsy and Meanie. Gravity is a b!tch.

[Steve]

Now, who here has not, in the distant past of course, had a time when the planet was not our friend.
Personally, the Earth has hit me a time or two.

[Gary]

Poor lad, clearly he struggles with an inner ear malady!

[Omniskeptic]

Like many laws, the law of gravity is not strictly enforced in LA.

[Jeff Meyerson]

"I'm not drunk, officer, really, I just saw a quarter on the ground. Would you believe a nickel? A piece of lint?"

An arrest affidavit says the officer who stopped Houston had to tell him to stand up after his fall, and Houston then performed poorly on field sobriety tests.

Gee, really?

Although, to be fair, my wife doesn't drink at all (neither does she drive, but that's a different story) and she says her balance is so bad she'd surely fail a sobriety test.

[Betsy]

Lissen, I had me a 3-day case of 24-hour flu this week, and spent some genuine quality time attempting to Become One with the cold tile floor in the bathroom. It reminded me of some legendary hangovers in my youth, but unfortunately without the rip-roaring and high-larious preliminaries.

*sigh*
Age: all of the pain; none of the fun.

[Steve]

He fell flat on his face with a BAC of .139?
When too drunk to drive is at .08?
Amateur hour?
Come on, people, I'm trying to manufacture some fake sneering. Help me out.
Yes, I've been drunk. But I've never been told my BAC is .08. Or .139, whatever.
Does a reading of .139 really mean you'd fall flat?
Are you really drunk at .08, or is it a convenient level with a good fudge factor built in?

[O the Umanity]

Steve - I think the phraseology/philosophy of 0.08 is "impaired" ... and I'd tend to go along with that ... of course body type and size have a major influence on whut that actually means ...

A person (not necessarily a guy) who's 6'7" tall and weighs 319 pounds can consume a LOT more alcoholic beverages before his BAC reaches 0.08 ... partly becuz he prolly has about 14 pints of blood in his body, it bein' quite large ...

OTOH, a petite small person (not necessarily a female) of 5'0" who weighs 104 pounds (such as my oldest granddaughter, who happens to be female), can reach that same BAC of 0.08 with p'haps as little as an ounce or two of similar boozification ...

It's a "workable" benchmark ... becuz the lawyers have got hold of every aspect of our lives, and the nannystate mentality demands it, as do the court systems ...

My WAG would be that the face-faller with 0.139 wuz mebbe less large than sum folks, and prolly chugged several whutevers in a relatively short period of time ...

And BTW ... feedin' coffee to a drunk will NOT sober 'em up ... all y'all get is a wide-awake drunk ...

[max]

Falling flat on the face at .139 would be a light-weight, yes. A serious drinker (*cough* borderline alcoholic *cough*) can pull off a .139 without it being noticeable, and even a moderate drinker (coupla week) shouldn't be falling down drunk until BAC gets to the .2 range.

Or so I have read, the previous statements should not be taken to mean that now or at any time in the past have I used, sold or purchased illegal substances nor that now or in the past has anyone I am familiar with to my knowledge used,sold or purchased illegal substances. wait this is alcohol, forget the last part.

[offset patio umbrella]

Good info, well many thank you to the author. It is incomprehensible to me now, but in general, the particular usefulness and importance is overpowering. Thanks again and good luck!!!

[Betsy]

High praise indeed, o.p.u.

[Ernie G]

From an old joke:
"That feller layin' on the floor...Is he drunk?"

"Naw, he ain't drunk. I just seen his foot move."