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January 27, 2012


Python bites Madison woman's face at book club

(Thanks to Cliff Koehler)


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Dang, scooped in my own back yard again... I'm sure I either know one of the women in that club, or the snake.

Obviously there needs to be some level of book club regulation to prevent his sort of thing from recurring.

Still MORE sloppy journalism ... this time can be blamed on the "journalist" wantin' to seem wittier than he/she (I din't notice gender) really is ...

An "asp" is NOT a "python" ... conversely, a "python" is NOT an "asp" ... they're cousins in snakeitudinousness, but one's a pit viper, the other is a constrictor by trade ... "writer" wanted to be clever, so alluded to Cleopatra's purported penchant for slithery adornment and coupled that with the reputed cause of her demisal ...

Besides that ... um ... I got nuthin' ...

"She just wanted to hold her," said Madison police spokesman Joel DeSpain in a news release.

I'm sure the python or asp or whatever had those sad, puppy-dog eyes that said "Just cuddle with me, please"....

On the other hand, I've seen Boa Constrictors give that look that says they want to "cuddle" the life outta ya!

And really, who knew snakes read?

These things just never happen at Oprah book club meetings. We just get drunk and yell at our husbands to go buy some wine. We've also quit letting women with insulin pumps into the meetings.

Thank you, nursecindy.

17 years is somewhat elderly for a Ball Python; they tend to get crotchety at that age and don't like unfamiliar handlers. This was the reptile equivalent of get off my lawn.

I'm sure that Annie was just tired of those sappy "Oh how cute!" looks. I mean, even a snake can only be pushed so far.

Writing Workshop I. Exercise: Create a scenario using the following sentence.

Once Annie was removed from the woman's face, the python went back into the terrarium

and what book was being read?? was it a dave barry tome??? huh?

No lasting trauma? Yeh, right. I'm just sayin', I got bit in the face by a doberman that I wanted to pet when I was 4. Luckily there was no permanent physical damage, but I'm 42 and I'm still not over it.

Sends an electronic hug to Girlogic ... our second granddaughter had a similar "bite trauma" when she wuz about that same age ... fortunately, she doesn't seem to have any mental scars, and one really hasta know where to look for the one oddly strange dimple on her cheek ... this one wuz a Rotty-Doby cross, and "never did that before" ...

'Scuse Moi ... it wuz a Rotty-Pit Bull cross ... I regret the egregious error ...

Our dachshund, Hurry, bit a hole through one of my ears and took a chunk out of my lower lip.
No trauma, just a few scars.
And bragging rights about being the first boy in eastern Kentucky with a pierced ear.

Thanks, O, you made my day. :) Likewise, you have to look for the only lasting scar on my chin. That retarded dog went for my mouth, and mostly chipped some baby teeth. He was chained, so I'm totally to blame, I suppose. Lots of kids were gathered for a bd party. To this day, I'm not afraid of dogs, but I do have some trust issues. And I should prolly warn O about hugging me. Sometimes I bite...is that a side effect of my incident???

Apparently the bite-ee wasn't a Parselmouth.

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