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November 29, 2011

STAND TALL, BULLDOGS

From The New York Freaking Times: ...bulldogs are the most relentless farters in the canine world.

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

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Finally, a species that can take the title away from me. I am persistent but not relentless.

Explains so much about the Brits.

The New York Times has obviously not met my dog.

I've had 2 bulldogs and trust me, they do it all the time. Other than that they make great pets.

Stewie is supposed to be pure Papillon but we look at him and know a bulldog sneaked into that pen one night.
And if there is a suspicious scent in the air, you know Stewie will be there.

The end result of all the compression is that many bulldogs can barely breathe.”

Much like their owners, after the barrage of farts.

Royal Canin has developed a special bulldog formula with wave-shaped kibbles (they look like Fritos) that make it easier for bulldogs to grasp and chew. The food also boasts “highly digestible proteins,” because bulldogs are the most relentless farters in the canine world.

Yup, Fritos do that to me also. But I usually take some Pepto and the situation abates.

“They aren’t athletic or especially healthy,” she said. “Most can’t have sex without help — they’re too short and stocky.

Help them have sex? Ewww....TMI if you know what I mean. But doing nothing means 1) the problem may solve itself because 2) bulldogs will become extinct.

I saw a list once, ranking various dog breeds according to intelligence, with border collies and standard poodles at the top, and bulldogs at the very bottom. The author of the list said that bulldogs are difficult to train because they can't remember things from one minute to the next. He added that some bulldogs can get lost at the end of their own leash.

The popularity of the bulldog is inversely proportional with that of the dogcow.

List of smartest breeds from http://petrix.com/dogint/1-10.html (not sure about this link, but it came up in google).

Rank Breed
1 Border Collie
2 Poodle
3 German Shepherd
4 Golden Retriever
5 Doberman Pinscher
6 Shetland Sheepdog
7 Labrador Retriever
8 Papillon
9 Rottweiler
10 Australian Cattle Dog

These dogs were ranked lowest by the same site:

Rank Breed
70 Shih Tzu
71 Basset Hound
72 Mastiff
Beagle
73 Pekingese
74 Bloodhound
75 Borzoi
76 Chow Chow
77 Bulldog
78 Basenji
79 Afghan Hound

Here's the top and bottom of the list from Rank Breed
70 Shih Tzu
71 Basset Hound
72 Mastiff
Beagle
73 Pekingese
74 Bloodhound
75 Borzoi
76 Chow Chow
77 Bulldog
78 Basenji
79 Afghan Hound

Here's the top and bottom of the list according to http://www.stanleycoren.com/e_intelligence.htm

Rank Breed

1. Border Collies
2. Poodle
3. German Shepherd
4. Golden Retriever
5. Doberman Pincher
6. Shetland Sheepdog
7. Labrador Retriever
8. Papillon
9. Rottwieler
10. Australian Cattle Dog
11. Pembrook Welsh Corgi
12. Miniature Schnauzer

At the low end of the intelligence rankings are:

106. Borzoi
107. Chow Chow
108. Bull dog
109. Basenji
110. Afghan Hound

From this site: One of the more surprising things that this book points out is that, depending upon your life style, it may be more difficult to live with a more intelligent, rather than a less intelligent dog.

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