TOUGH CROWD
Climber who cut off arm to escape speaking at MSU
(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)
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August 29, 2011
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He didn't cut off his arm to escape the speaking engangement, however. Or even the engagement.
Posted by: oneblankspace | August 29, 2011 at 01:57 PM
This topic not eligible for snarky comments.
Thank you.
Posted by: Emmett Flatus | August 29, 2011 at 02:00 PM
Lucky for him that it was his hand. Most guys would just as well die, rather than cutting off other more important body parts.
Posted by: OC Dolphin | August 29, 2011 at 02:03 PM
Did you hear the one about the FEMA employee who got his hand trapped under a rock and in desperation decided to chew it off? It wasn't until he finished he realised he chewed off the wrong hand.
Posted by: Wingnut | August 29, 2011 at 02:08 PM
Editor to the newsroom...STAT!
Posted by: Layzeeboy | August 29, 2011 at 02:14 PM
He won't get far on foot.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 02:37 PM
I'm sure they'll give him a hand
Posted by: sandy | August 29, 2011 at 02:40 PM
I wonder if he'll use two teleprompter?
Posted by: Wizkid54 | August 29, 2011 at 03:08 PM
No doubt Dave would give an arm and a leg to speak at such an event!
Posted by: Mike | August 29, 2011 at 03:14 PM
Thumbs up!
Um, Thumb up!
Posted by: Olo Baggins of Bywater | August 29, 2011 at 03:35 PM
I'm sure he didn't leave without giving them the finger.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 03:40 PM
Watch out people!! He's armed! (One armed.) I know , Very bad of me.
But there are three ways to interpret the headline:
1. He cut off his own arm to avoid the speaking engagement.
2. MSU though he suffered enough, so they cancelled his speakng thing. ("escape(s) speaking" the key phrase.
3. He will speak anyway, and the editor was out drunk.
Mr. Language Person, can we get a ruling? I think three is most likely.
Posted by: funny man | August 29, 2011 at 03:45 PM
Meanieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! OMGWTFBBQ!!!
*ahem*
Hi ;)
Posted by: Siouxie | August 29, 2011 at 03:45 PM
Siouxieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! LOLMAOFL!!! (or something....)
*cough*
Hi.~0
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 03:58 PM
This one goes in the Misleading Headlines Hall of Shame.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | August 29, 2011 at 04:01 PM
I wonder if Dave has ever felt like cutting anything off to avoid a book tour? Like maybe Ridley's arm?
Posted by: nursecindy | August 29, 2011 at 04:21 PM
I sat through classes like that.
Posted by: Clankie | August 29, 2011 at 05:02 PM
I've had dates like that.
Posted by: Wingnut | August 29, 2011 at 05:26 PM
When I was working as an Occupational Health Nurse for Freightliner Corp. I had to attend a two day conference on natural rubber latex. A woman behind me in the seminar actually knitted an entire blanket during the lectures. If there is anything you need to know about natural rubber latex let me know. I'll see if I can find someone that can answer your questions. The only thing I remember is if you want to see if you have a latex allergy to blow up a balloon. If your lips feel itchy or numb then you probably are allergic to latex.
Posted by: nursecindy | August 29, 2011 at 05:46 PM
Wingnut, we called it the Coyote syndrome. Better to chew your arm off than to wake them....
Posted by: wvplantman | August 29, 2011 at 05:49 PM
Cindy - she knitted a latex blanket??
Posted by: Diva | August 29, 2011 at 06:01 PM
Metal detectors will be installed at all the doors leading to the auditorium - just in case someone in the crowd arrives armed.
Still, I gotta hand it to this guy!
*duck*
Posted by: PirateBoy | August 29, 2011 at 07:39 PM
It's a shame he blew the school off, but they'll probably just give him a slap on the wrist.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 08:03 PM
Meanie that's mean!
Posted by: nursecindy | August 29, 2011 at 08:16 PM
Forewarned is forearmed, NC.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 08:20 PM
so if he escaped then he's a fugitive?
Posted by: sandy | August 29, 2011 at 08:39 PM
Sandy, I've no doubt the long arm of the law will soon catch up with him!
Unless he tries strong-arm robbery....
(Jackie Gleason's modified Smokey and the Bandit quote):
"Five finger on the fender there, son."
Posted by: PirateBoy | August 29, 2011 at 08:49 PM
More of a bandit, perhaps, sandy.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 08:50 PM
...so he's slotted to speak again? single handedly?
Posted by: sandy | August 29, 2011 at 08:58 PM
He'll have the audience in the palm of his hand.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 09:01 PM
they'll enjoy his offhand remarks
Posted by: sandy | August 29, 2011 at 09:06 PM
He does have a gripping story to tell.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 09:19 PM
- told first person, not second hand
Posted by: sandy | August 29, 2011 at 09:23 PM
On the other hand, I'm not sure how well his audience will grasp the nuances.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 09:29 PM
- but he's not afraid to go out on a limb
Posted by: sandy | August 29, 2011 at 09:38 PM
Guilt is probably gnawing at him over this.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 09:40 PM
- but the school gave him severance pay
Posted by: sandy | August 29, 2011 at 09:46 PM
- after their initial heavy-handed maneuvers.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 09:49 PM
- they've adopted a hands-off approach
Posted by: sandy | August 29, 2011 at 09:57 PM
Still a lot of unseemly finger-pointing going on, though.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 09:59 PM
well, he shouldn't bite the hand that feeds
Posted by: sandy | August 29, 2011 at 10:02 PM
There's a protocol for such situations. It's in the school manual.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 10:04 PM
hmmmm...i'll hafta thumb thru it
Posted by: sandy | August 29, 2011 at 10:07 PM
I know you keep it handy at all times.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 29, 2011 at 10:09 PM
Can somebody stop Meanie and Sandy? I will say Meanie and Sandy's comments are though provoking. Just the right nuance too. Not heavy handed at all.
Posted by: nursecindy | August 29, 2011 at 10:58 PM
He making an arm and a leg off that arm.
Posted by: Elon | August 29, 2011 at 11:53 PM
> Can somebody stop Meanie and Sandy?
I think we should give them the elbow!
Sorry. I offer a complete and utter retraction. The imputation was totally without basis in fact and was in no way fair comment and was motivated purely by malice, and I deeply regret any distress that my comments may have caused you or your family, and I hereby undertake not to repeat any such slander at any time in the future.
Posted by: Mike | August 30, 2011 at 01:36 AM