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August 29, 2011

NOOOO

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Thought for sure you had some breaking Barry Manilow news. Luckily it's just a hurricane.

On a completely different topic...How did Lady Gaga turn into Larry Gaga?

SH!T. I just pulled a tree limb off my car and put the deck furniture back out.

Don't want anyone to get hurt or property damage but I wish this would come through Texas and dump some rain. If Texas keeps drying up we may have to buy one of the great lakes and move it to Dallas.

Take your mark. Get set. GIRD!!!!

PS. Lazy, put the limb back on the car and see if you can exchange your deck furniture for a deadly missle.

Duck's eye view of a shotgun blast.

I just saw that picture of Larry Gaga, she did that because someone said she could not possibly get any uglier.

OFG--Have you tried planning an important outdoor event, such as a wedding? That seems to work when I don't want rain.

Last outdoor wedding I went to in my suit and tie the temp got up to about 100 degrees. Have not worn a suit or tie or been to a wedding since. I have tried the old washing my car trick. Didn't work.

My son and DIL had an outdorr wedding last year. Started out beautiful. In the middle of the ceremony the sky opened up. Everyone had to dash about a hundred yards to the reception venue. Had to finish the ceremony inside. (As I was running alongside my son I joked to him that he wasn't really married yet so he could get away with running all the way to the parking lot and take off).

OTOH, I was at an outdoor wedding last weekend and it was about 105. (NOTE TO SELF - Do not wear a black suit to an outdoor wedding in August).

Aw, you sunshine staters got some more o'them twirly things comin' at ya, huh?

Y'all oughta move up here, our twirlies are a lot smaller. Although some of 'em got a mean streak.

My favorite outdoor wedding story was a sunrise wedding. Everyone sat sleepy eyed and heard the sound of the trash truck making its round of the neighborhood.

They say the next one will be Katya.

(José is on is way from Bermuda to Nova Scotia.)

Katya, Jose, whatever. So long as they don't name it "Carter." Such a hurricane would go straight to Cuba and then up to Florida!

Is it time to buy extra wine boxes?

Any port in a storm, Sioux.

I hope all the wusses my friends up North survived Irene.

FTR, down here in Miami, we don't get our shutters out till it's at least a Cat3. Cat 1 is a tropical fart breeze.

To avoid depressions, take plenty of Vitamin D.

Oh, what...sorry, wrong kind of depression.

Dave, not every TD grows up to be a Hurry Cane. Just ask Horatio.

And if if it does, surely if we sacrifice Barry Manilow it will leave us the heck alone.

Irene has been downgraded to a British summer

José as a hurricane name comes around on a regular basis -- how come never a HoseB?

If this one comes anywhere near New York I'm going to borrow Siouxie's backup machete and come down to Florida.

Oh geez, Jeffie. What? Your got your hair messed up a bit?

*rolls eyes*

I guess Dave will have Judi out buying him bleach, batteries, and plywood tomorrow.

I knew Irene was a fizzle when yesterday, on the news, the video from the beach areas showed the traffic lights not only NOT lying in the street, but working.

TD Twelve. Is that my new bank?

Welcome to Hurricane Season, folks! On yer right, you'll see Cousin Eb and A'nt Darleen standing in their attic waiting for the Coast Guard. They didn't want to leave their mansion (out house/shack) for the hoopla, so had Sonny crank the generat'r an' watched it on the tee-vee. And off to your left, that swishy stuff seems to be something called "rain," or for natives, "Storm Surge." You folks from Texas and the midwest might want to get yer cam'ras out. I hear'tis quite rare back home. And now we'll stop at this here moonshine still to celebrate Hurricane Katrina. She came aboard six years ago. Put on yer boots, folks!


We are thrilled that there is a brand new catastrophic killer horror hurricane in the making, soon to end life as we know it. Or at least blow over a few lizards in Dave's back yard.

Because post-Irene, we have noticed an horrific Panic Vacuum in our Great Country. This new apocalyptic storm will give MSM and the Commander in Chief of Cyclones something to fixate on. Whew.

I knew Irene was a fizzle when I tuned in the Times Square Web Cam at 8 am Sunday and saw someone out walking her poodle.

Well Clankie, poodles are water dogs after all.

The lady was trolling for alligators. Poodles make good gator bait.

Yeah, gators consider dogs to be self-delivering pizzas.

The wind wasn't bad here, but the rain is a pain. Would anyone like to play Marco Polo in a football stadium?

Look at the bright side, people who live in hurricane country. If this turns into something it won't hit until early next week which means you can still enjoy your weekend. Putting up the plywood. Then you get out of going to work for a day or two. Just like snow days in the midwest.

*snork* @ Meanie's "port"

We lost a car to Irene and will be without power for at least a week. We do have a generator though, so life does not suck quite as much as it could.

Everytime I start to get frustrated, I think WWDD (What Would Dave Do)and I smile, say booger, and carry on.

Let's hope this one moves to Texas as a big rain event.

Everytime I start to get frustrated, I think WWDD (What Would Dave Do)and I smile, say booger, and carry on.

I'm adopting this philosophy!

Just so you know it's pronounced KAH-Tyah

Tell your friends and weather barbies.

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