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March 24, 2011


Suttle unrolls toilet paper tax

(Thanks to oldfatguy and Robert Mathis, who views this as "a terrible way to wipe out the federal deficit.")


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First grade art teachers are worried that their favorite media will just go down the tubes.

Omaha to Norfolk : 112 miles

Much like my lowflo, this will have a lot of trouble passing. It's biased against people who are full of sh!t.

Sure. Then in an effort to cut down on consumption I'll just use my tax forms.

Let me get this straight. They get good grade toilet paper for about 25 cents a roll?
I wonder what the penalty would be for TP smuggling?
About all you could get around here for that price would be Scotts and that would be the large-grit sandpaper variety.

We'll call this the Sheryl Crow tax: to cut back and to save on taxes, everyone will choose to use just one sheet (single ply) per wipe. However, underwear sales will skyrocket.

" Pit it on the table "...? Well, that doesn't sound very sanitary to me.

Mayor Suttle’s VAT

We tax your land and tax your home,
All you possess, from crypt to dome.
We tax three ways the daily wage
Of young and old and middle age.

We tax your cigarettes, and more,
We tax the alcohol you pour.
Your restaurant has a special rate
As does your bygone dad’s estate.

We tax your car and we impose
A tax on household goods and clothes.
Your haircuts, pedicures and nails
Are taxed as services or sales.

But still the budget comes up short
And now we’ve hit the last resort.
A dime a roll – a trifling fee –
For those who want to use T.P.

Our Democratic mayor sees
He’s got the people on their knees.
And so he adds upon their backs
This little Value Added Tax!


How about a buritto tax instead?

Eeewww, yes I'll bet the people who don't want to pay the tax will be... very.... unpleasant.

No tax on Depends, However?

Isn't just using the single-ply stuff taxing enough?

What's the big deal? I was taught in the army how to make do with one sheet per event.

Would that be a sit tax?

Don't take this tax sitting down ! Oh wait......

Do you collect before or after use -- is it a Value Added Tax?

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