SPEAKING OF THE OSCARS:

Feel free to comment on them here.

UPDATE: They sure ask some hard-hitting questions on the red carpet.

UPDATE: Here's an actual example of a red-carpet question: "When you're in the car ride over, who decides what music to listen to?"

UPDATE: Only 18 hours to go!

UPDATE: When I think Hollywood, I think JC Penney.

UPDATE: Only 19 hours to go!

UPDATE: Everybody is very thankful.

UPDATE: The "Wolfman" Achievement in Makeup guy actually looks like a wolf.

UPDATE: An Oscar shoutout to... The great state of Delaware!

UPDATE: The Knicks beat the Heat.

UPDATE: Let's bring Kirk Douglas back out.

UPDATE: Well, that certainly was two minutes and 11 seconds of pure entertainment shoehorned into just a little over three hours. Good night, everyone.

Comments

[Jeff Meyerson]

I think we need to blog the Oscars since 24 is no longer on.

So far the "red carpet" show has already sucked about half of my brain cells out, never to return.

Maria Menounos is probably an alien. Clearly she has no brain. That woman no one has ever heard of talking about how exciting the Green Room was took away my will to live.

Now Russell Brand has me eyeing my wrists and a big knife.

[nursecindy]

So far I've only known about 2 people they've spoken to on the Red Carpet. I only watch this part to see the dresses. They've made some remarks on the tuxedo's but personally those all look alike to me. I heard Charlie Sheen said he wouldn't accept an Oscar if they begged him. Good thing he hasn't been nominated for one.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Melissa Leo looks great.

I swear, every time Maria opens her mouth I want to shoot myself.

I hope you're watching the adorable kids from PS 22 in Staten Island. These kids are not only adorable but very talented.

[nursecindy]

Did they electrocute Tim Burton before he stepped on the Red Carpet?

[Jeff Meyerson]

It was Russell Brand, cindy - just channeling Tim Burton.

[nursecindy]

Dave looked much better in his Tuxedo last year.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Too bad judi isn't around to link to Dave's column about writing Oscar jokes for his good friend, Mr. Steve Martin.

Gee, I'm sure I'm not the only one who was thinking, "I wish they had the Moms of the nominees on telling us what they were like as kids."

[nursecindy]

I wonder if Steve Martin is still checking out the jokes he wrote last year?

[Guin]

Penelope Cruz wins so far. Matthew McConaghey's girl friend needs a bra.

[nursecindy]

Dave? I've notified several regular bloggers via Facebook that you are live blogging the Oscars.

[Guin]

Halle Berry wears the same dress every year, and looks spectacular each time.

[southerngirl]

and that's why i'm here - thanks, cindy

*waves to jeff*

[nursecindy]

Guin, any of us blog ladies could look that good with enough money. They sure show a lot of bosoms on the Red Carpet.

[nursecindy]

I hope Dave is still here.

[Guin]

Scarlett Johanssen needs to fire her hairdresser.

[nursecindy]

Is it a rule in Hollywood you can only have one shoulder in a dress?

[nursecindy]

btw, I would kill to look like Anne Hathaway

[Jeff Meyerson]

*waves back at southerngirl*

[Jeff Meyerson]

Guin, I think a lot of women need to fire their hairdressers.

cindy, there is nothing wrong with showing bosoms, don't you know that?

I'm glad ScarJo and Mila Kunis know it.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Anne Hathaway does look great. Other than perhaps a little too much lipstick.

So far the biggest problem is bad hairdos, as Guin said.

[nursecindy]

And they've shown Justin Timberlake too much.

[nursecindy]

Dave, if you could sing a duet with anyone in the world who would it be? That is also an actual question.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Jackis is cynically suggesting that Nicole Kidman is not wearing that dress because it is "comfortable" as she claimed but - perhaps - because she is indeed pregnant.

Either way, she looks great. And Gwynnie ("fashion icon") looks good as usual.

[Jeff Meyerson]

And she said Jay-Z because he's a genius!

WTFBBQ, Gwyneth?

Can't believe I forgot to mention Jennifer Hudson in the "bosom" post. Because, whoa!

[nursecindy]

Mrs. Meyerson! Jeff's looking at bosoms on TV!!

[Jeff Meyerson]

Who sent all the men (except James Franco) the memo not to shave tonight?

Whoever it was should be fired.

I wish I had the over on how many times they'd ask "does it ever get old?"

[Jeff Meyerson]

She's looking too, cindy.

"And it's gonna be great."

Thanks for that unbiased, unsolicited testimonial, Maria.

[Sharon Lurie]

I was watching the red carpet show, noting how tasteful and understated the clothes, hair, and makeup were, and how much more meaningful and intelligent-sounding the interviews were. Then I realized my cable was screwed up, and I was watching the Nashville Police Academy graduation ceremony on local access.

[nursecindy]

Good grief! Poor Kirk Douglas! He's getting old but like any typical man he still likes the ladies.

[nursecindy]

On second thought, considering he's 94 years old, Kirk isn't doing too bad after all.

[ArcticAl]

I'm disappointed. It's been almost 25 minutes and no one has set up a perimeter, no one has been shot in the thigh and Chloe hasn't broken into someone's computer. Clearly not a good replacement for 24.

[Boo Augustus]

Did Kirk Douglas just have another stroke?

[nursecindy]

I'm not saying this just because our Blog wrote them but, the jokes were better last year. Kirk Douglas was very good though.

[ArcticAl]

Why does she have stickers stuck on her breasts? Is this a new thing to replace tattoos?

[nursecindy]

I thought it was lace, ArticAl. But, I don't have my glasses on right now. I only put them on when a great looking guy comes on and says something intelligent. So far I've only put them on for Tom Hanks.

[Diva]

*shoots Al in the thigh*

*flashes bosoms at Jeff*

*thanks cindy for the heads up!*

Howdy, y'all! Yep, that proves it. If Josh Brolin doesn't look hot in a white tux, NO white guy can do it.

[Diva]

Oops! *Waves @ Dave and flashes him ... a smile* ;-)

[ArcticAl]

Why do women think that they look sexy when they wear a man's tuxedo? They look much better in dresses.

[ArcticAl]

Good Cahrlie Sheen joke!

[Diva]

I would say Anne Hathaway looks like a man, but then I saw THOSE SHOES!!

And got completely distracted because I SO knew she was gonna be singing to/about my Wolverine. *sigh*

And that is NOT the best look for that poor, flat-chested Marilyn.

Glory. Russell Brand. Again. At least he's paired with the delightful and always, ALWAYS elegant Helen Mirren.

[Diva]

Now THAT'S an elegant dress, whoever the heck she is.

[nursecindy]

Helen Mirren looks incredible and has so much class. Very good Charlie Sheen joke.

[Loudmouth]

I'm now watching a show about breakfast places in Washington. Better script, better jokes and they have bacon.

[nursecindy]

*SMACKS* Loudmouth. Turn the Oscar's back on.

[Diva]

Classic Reese. That dress is perfect for her, but she could lose the Barbie-meets-Skipper ponytail.

[Loudmouth]

What?? Leave bacon for ham??

[Diva]

*applauds Loudmouth* Well said. :D

[nursecindy]

Good one Loudmouth. I think Dave has fallen asleep.

[Diva]

I think you're right, cindy. :D

[Loudmouth]

Wish I had a biiig TV. I'd swear Mila Kunis was showing some nipplage.

[Siouxie]

I'm here! what did I miss?

Sorry, I was drooling over Hugh Jackman ;P

[nursecindy]

Siouxie, wake Dave up would you?

[ArcticAl]

You missed two perimeters and Jack shooting someone in the thigh, Siouxie.

[Loudmouth]

Pompous ponderous patouie.

Hey, Matthew MacConnahie (sic) with a shirt.

[Coconuts]

Just got here....thought Reese Witherspoon looked great!

[Diva]

Siouxie, apparently copious amounts of Russell Brand. In other words, not much.

[Coconuts]

Scarlett, comb your hair

[Diva]

Hey, Coco - agreed! But she always does.

[Siouxie]

DRINK!!

[Loudmouth]

How the hell could Russell Brand marry Katie...a girl?

[nursecindy]

Scarlett Johanssen really should fire her hair dresser. Or at the very least some one should hand her a brush.

[Coconuts]

Was Melissa Leo wearing a giant doily?

[Diva]

Oh, gross. That was the most self-serving looking rendition of "Happy Birthday" I've ever seen. I can't stand Celine.

[Diva]

Wow. It's just a bad hair day all over when even Marisa Tomei's locks are dull.

[Loudmouth]

Yow, Marissa.

[nursecindy]

I agree, Diva.

[Hammond rye]

*drinks*

[Diva]

Really, Cate? Did someone forget to put the portrait in your giant cameo frame?

[nursecindy]

Is Kate Blanchett baking brownies back in the green room? Her dress looks like an apron.

[Diva]

*squeals* HAMMIEEEEEEEE!!!! Long time no *WAVE!!!*

[Coconuts]

Cate Blanchette - elegant... (sightly weird bodice on dress, however)

[Loudmouth]

Ha, great comment. "That's gross". then awards them the Oscar.

[nursecindy]

Also *WAVES* at hammie.

[Siouxie]

WAVES @ Hammie!!! HOW THE HELL ARE YOU???????????

[Diva]

I liked the "Congratulations, Nerds" from whatshisface - you know, Peter Parker's pal....

[Siouxie]

That does look like a giant doily on her chest.

Anne Hathaway - stunning dresses! pretty awesome voice too!

[Siouxie]

hey..I can read...

now the the heck outta there!

[Diva]

When they trip over scripted notes, that's a clue that they belong behind the camera....

[Hammond rye]

*waves @Diva, nursecindy, and Siouxie!!!!!!!!!!!!*

[Sharon Lurie]

Did I misinterpret this, or did Christian Bale forget the name of his wife during his acceptance speech?

[Diva]

Y'all thought it was a doily? I thought it was a cameo frame missing the photo. :D

[Annie Where-but-Graupel]

Cut us some slack - it's dang cold here in Oscarland. You try looking red carpet ready when your hair just got completely graupelled.

[nursecindy]

I thought it was an apron. It did look like a cameo frame missing the photo. I love Randy Newman!

[Coconuts]

Melissa Leo was wearing the doily. You know, the one who dropped the f-bomb during her acceptance speech.

[Siouxie]

Oh geez....Randy Newman??

[Diva]

Sharon, I had the exact same thought. He did not cover the slip well. :D

Ah, Kevin Spacey - you are witty and wonderful. :)

[Loudmouth]

Annie, Somebody groped ScarJo?!

[Siouxie]

Sharon, it looked that way but I think he just choked up.

Freezing your buns there, amiga?? lol

[nursecindy]

Thanks Diva. I couldn't think of his name.

[Diva]

Coco - I live for those moments. ;-)

Annie - excellent word use!

Ooooooh, LOVE the blue dress!!!

[Annie Where-but-Graupel]

Dave has much nicer hair than Randy Newman.

Mandy Moore is wearing a dress made completely of dead Smurfs.

[Loudmouth]

Insipid, doesn't have a beat, you can't dance to it. I'll give it a 1, Dick.

[nursecindy]

It's cold in Oscar Land and it's 80 degrees here in N.C. today. Strange weather.

[Sharon Lurie]

Dear Diva, I imagine it is most nerve-wracking standing up there. Phillip Seymour Hoffman got some flack for forgetting to include his girlfriend in his Oscar acceptance speech, but given his Oscar was for playing Truman Capote, it is perfectly understandable.

Kevin Spacey is great. I was in the audience for a taping of "The Tonight Show." Kevin was the first guest, and he was posting on Twitter during his interview. He also told a story about when he was acting in a play in London, and someone in the audience wouldn't turn the ringer off on his or her cell phone. Kevin Spacey finally broke character and told the person, "Tell them to call back later!"

[Randy Newman]

Who you callin' a Dick, Loudmouth??

[Diva]

Sharon, that's awesome. :D

[Loudmouth]

Bwonk, bwonk, bwonk, bwonk, bwonk.

[Diva]

Another FABulous blue dress.

[Siouxie]

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[Loudmouth]

But what about the Nigerian Kung Fu movie?