WE'RE SURE THERE'S A PERFECTLY INNOCENT EXPLANATION
Man Arrested With 2,060 Diamonds In Stomach
(Thanks to jon harris)
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Man Arrested With 2,060 Diamonds In Stomach
(Thanks to jon harris)
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Eating carats is supposed to be healthy.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | October 29, 2010 at 12:11 PM
'He had placed the jewels into 42 condoms and swallowed them... After police fed him laxatives, it took him six hours to eject the stones'
Ouch!
Someone's gonna need some 'Chicken Soup for the Rubber Soul'
Posted by: sandy | October 29, 2010 at 12:19 PM
Poo, ice, sacks, and crime...how many were going to do hard time?
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | October 29, 2010 at 12:35 PM
Normally I would find a man with this many diamonds very appealing. This one, not so much.
Posted by: nursecindy | October 29, 2010 at 12:39 PM
*smacks sandy with a sackful o'
diamondsdimes*Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | October 29, 2010 at 12:39 PM
((((annie!))))
hey, i <3 the beatles, ok?
Posted by: sandy | October 29, 2010 at 12:42 PM
(from the jailhouse crapper)
ow. ow. ow. ow.
ow. ow. ow.
ow. ow.
ow.
Posted by: mudstuffin | October 29, 2010 at 01:11 PM
Sounds like a dangerous way to smuggle jewels.
Posted by: Theresa | October 29, 2010 at 01:19 PM
I've heard of "blood diamonds". This is a whole new twist.
Posted by: bonmot | October 29, 2010 at 01:27 PM
Diamonds weren't so bad - it was those dang Tiffany settings.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | October 29, 2010 at 01:31 PM
Laxatives and Bananas and Six Hours
Loosey in the guy with diamonds!
Loosey in the guy with diamonds!
Oooh - Oooh!
Posted by: MOTW | October 29, 2010 at 01:37 PM
1 Hazar = 1000
1 Lakh = 100,000 ( 0.1 million)
1 crore = 10,000,000 ( 10 million)
1 arab = 100 crore = 1 billion
(So “3 Crore rupees” equals roughly 2 dollars and 47 cents… --Allen)
Posted by: Allen at Division | October 29, 2010 at 01:45 PM
Diamonds are a guts best friend.
Posted by: Clankie | October 29, 2010 at 01:46 PM
Diamonds in the roughage.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | October 29, 2010 at 01:48 PM
Well..someone told him to cut the crap.
Posted by: Siouxie | October 29, 2010 at 01:52 PM
If there are any stones left in his system, I'm sure someone will be glad to mount them for him in jail.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | October 29, 2010 at 01:53 PM
Annie...I think you switched your pronouns there
Posted by: Betsy | October 29, 2010 at 01:57 PM
This gives smuggling a whole new facet.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | October 29, 2010 at 02:31 PM
Just where I was going, Mot; you beat me to it.
Posted by: bonmot | October 29, 2010 at 02:43 PM
EXCELLENT PUNS !
Posted by: LeDud | October 29, 2010 at 02:52 PM
Remember, you can only find a Tiffany Case in Diamonds are Forever...
Posted by: Allen at Division | October 29, 2010 at 02:56 PM
If they had used a portlier dude for transport, they may have gotten away with it, since he'd have more room for um, 'cargo.'
After all, everyone in the smuggling trade knows that diamonds are for heifers.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | October 29, 2010 at 03:02 PM
*snicker* Cue Shirley Bassey--but with More Cowbell!
Posted by: Allen at Division | October 29, 2010 at 03:42 PM
why wood insanity would work in my case? in comparison, I'm normal!
Posted by: CrissyM | October 29, 2010 at 04:02 PM
Good one, Annie!
Butt we wouldn't want to condom such activities.
Posted by: bonmot | October 29, 2010 at 04:14 PM
The other inmates called him "Rolex", due to his jeweled movement.
Posted by: bonmot | October 29, 2010 at 04:21 PM
Not to be confused with his cellmate, "Timex," who takes a licking and keeps on tricking.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | October 29, 2010 at 04:53 PM
*snork* @ Annie.
Posted by: bonmot | October 29, 2010 at 05:11 PM
Diamonds are forulcers.
Or for Annie: Diamonds are for effers.
Posted by: Loudmouth | October 29, 2010 at 06:48 PM
Pubic zirconia
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | October 29, 2010 at 07:27 PM
I hear this guy is trying to cut back to just a couple of Debeers per day.
Posted by: OC Dolphin | October 29, 2010 at 07:37 PM
Not only polish that turd, cut and set it, too.
Posted by: Loudmouth | October 29, 2010 at 09:09 PM
'Robbed' for Her Pleasure
Posted by: sandy | October 29, 2010 at 09:21 PM
Isn't that near where those civit cats "process" coffee? Does it make the diamonds more valuable, too?
"It's not just any engagement diamond dear. It's special. It's one a guy in India pulled out of his ass. What??"
Posted by: Loudmouth | October 29, 2010 at 09:22 PM
The Stool Of India.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | October 29, 2010 at 09:27 PM
The Jewel of the Bile
Posted by: sandy | October 29, 2010 at 09:44 PM
The Brown Jewels.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | October 29, 2010 at 10:04 PM
His throne was encrusted with them
Posted by: sandy | October 29, 2010 at 10:07 PM
Like BB's rattling around in a tin bucket.
Posted by: Steve | October 29, 2010 at 10:07 PM
HEH. When I was a young member of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police in Calgary, I arrested a guy who we knew was trying to smuggle what was then a large amount of heroin, inside his stomach.
We charged him with posession of narcotics for the purpose of trafficking, even though the ....errr...evidence was not readily available.
After about a week, the local daily, the Calgary Herald, started running a countdown above their masthead...eg "14 days and still counting".
He was stubborn....lasted 28 days before he had to succumb and....errr...deposit the evidence.
That is when I knew that drug enforcement was a $h1tty job....
Posted by: Afkat | October 29, 2010 at 10:10 PM
His colon be a gem of the oh-sh!ts.
*I know, I know. Mass groaning time*
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | October 29, 2010 at 10:15 PM
took him a month to crack, afkat?
Posted by: sandy | October 29, 2010 at 10:17 PM
Nice, Afkat - you Canucks can hold a guy 28 days without evidence, yet you can't seem to keep Celine Dion 10 minutes. Thanks loads.
And no, we don't want Randy Quaid back.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | October 29, 2010 at 11:02 PM
*snork* @ everyone; and massive *groan* for Meanie
Posted by: Betsy | October 30, 2010 at 12:04 AM
Wow, Afkat. Talk about anal retentive.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | October 30, 2010 at 08:58 AM
When I first read the headline, I thought it was
about this...
(But it wasn't.)
Posted by: funny man | October 30, 2010 at 10:15 AM
Diamonds are forever...
which explains Neil's popularity...
which explains why it takes at least six hours...
and yet, fails to answer the question, will he be doing time on the rock for swallowing the rocks?
Posted by: funny man | October 30, 2010 at 10:26 AM
ALSO a whole new meaning to
"get your rocks off (out)"!!!
Posted by: funny man | October 30, 2010 at 10:28 AM
As Obi-Wan might say: These are not the family jewels you are looking for.
His jail nickname better be "Bugs Bunny", after all the carets he ate!
Posted by: PirateBoy | October 31, 2010 at 12:03 AM