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September 22, 2010


Just don't let her back out.

(Thanks to Joe in Japan)


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Paris Hilton?

And...could you take Lindsay and Snooki while you're (not your) at it?

Maybe she'll eat some blowfish sushi?

I hope she stays at the Hyatt.

Maybe they can grant her dog refugee status.


humpf! who cares about your stupid 'great wall' anyway?

why, oh why are these twits even famous.
famous twits bagnfarb

Send her up into the mountains to find those monkeys that sit in a hot tub! That's hot!

Dave, let's compromise. How about we drop her halfway between here and Japan? It seems fair for everyone involved, except maybe the Micronesians.

Elon, that would put her in Hawaii.

Dave, let's compromise. How about we drop her halfway between here and Japan? It seems fair for everyone involved, except maybe the Micronesians.

Posted by: Elon | September 22, 2010 at 10:12 AM

No, Elon, let's not. Godzilla's out there somewhere...and the Japanese would still be pissed at us if we woke him up.

Although Godzilla stomping through Tokyo would likely do less damage than Paris Hilton, so they'd still come out ahead in the end...


Paris announced today that she was cancelling her Asian tour. She plays an instrument?
Oh...that kind.

Dear Lord, just shoot her and get us out of our misery.

More likely shoot her up, Siouxie.

I think we need to import some 'made in Japan' immigration people.

More likely to shoot her up, Siouxie.

Can we import some of those 'made in Japan' immigration cops?

We'll always have Paris.


Forget Paris.

oh, and what's up with
that haiku? it doesn't rhyme!
That's why it's haikew...

It's not fair for Paris to be exiled alone in Japan. I think we should send Snooki and Lindsay Lohan over there to keep her company. Don't let them out either.

NOW where will I leave those bunnies??

Dave, that's mean. What did the Japanese ever do to us that would make you want to inflict Paris on th - - .. oh.

Paris Hilton -->
loin harpist
tonsil rip, ah!
a hip nostril
lost hairpin

a haikew...

everyone knows that
'paris' is not in japan!
like, oh my god, duh!

Posted by: snooki

Here comes Paris Cottontail,
Snortin' up the cocaine trail...

She had such a good time in Miami that she should consider moving there.

The Japanese immigration authorities were then denied entry, as well.

*SMACKS* Annie!! Oh no she do-ont!!

We got rid of OJ and the Jersey sluts and Madonna and one of the three Kardashians. We're almost crud-free.


i'm behind the times
to that fact i'm resigned
i thot a snooki was a fish that in a reef you might find
on toppa that i'm inclined
join the chorus y'all whine
about lindsay in the news too much - but paris is fine
yo i'm speaking my mind...

i got me an itch
for a girl dat's rich
let me party on her dime
a skinny white bitch

we never fight no she ain't that smart
i tell you the truth coming straight from my heart
i'll be her puppydog cause it's understood
she got the magic - turn my flesh into wood

don't forget about that britney
man dat girl you must be sh1t'n me
and how bout lady gagme
with a face like a drag queen
and dat nasty girl with lumps
(man i could never get dat drunk)
but put this american in paris and you got one happy punk

i got me an itch
for a girl dat's rich
let me party on her dime
a skinny white bitch

i held her hand, and she captured my soul
and i'll hold her hair when she bend over the bowl
take off in the limo when the party gets old
and do it one more time before she turns up stone cold

i got me an itch
for a girl dat's rich
let me party on her dime
a skinny white bitch

even when she barfin' she still look good

JBF - Can't wait for the premier episode of Paris Hilton's Japanese Best Friend

Nice haikew, sandy.

Sends mud a shiny blogthug grille.

All up innair!

Paris Hilton: she puts the "ho" in hotel

big snork @ sandy's haikew

At minimum I'd say that the best action to even try to save her life and maybe a bit of her career would be to check herself into a long term rehab NOW while she is waiting for her legal fate. If she could embrace a program, work it, and STAY until summoned by the courts, a few things might happen. First, she might learn something. Second, she might become a little bit clear headed at least. Third, it would help her to stay away from her toxic friends and family and any more "triggers" in her way. Fourth, she might actually learn something about herself and decide that she is worth more than she's been giving her self credit. And last, but not least, it would show good faith to the legal powers that be that maybe she is serious. In my opinion this is the least she could do. If she doesn't do this immediately, I don't see much positive going on for her in the future. Of course, only she can turn this around, and she has to want it.

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