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August 31, 2010

SURE!

Because everyone carries gum in a plastic baggie.

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Eight grams of gum would make a really big bubble.

Not as large as the bubble between her ears but still pretty big.

This explains her problem of walking and chewing gum at the same time.

Steve, I have a feeling she has a problem doing that even when she is sober. I have a great idea for a new tv show. Paris and Lindsay Do Jail Time.

Paris Hilton would be worth a lot more money if she was left in her box.

Note to Mark Gray: If there is only 800 mg, it would be best to indicate that as 0.8 grams. Some people (like Cheesewiz) might miss that tiny decimal point.

This is not intended to disparage Cheesewiz, just to point out an example of why the People writer has to do it right.

That much easier to convince her that Miami is her new home. No backs!

She's a doorknob. Everyone gets a turn.

Love how she's doing her klassic "nose pose" to minimize how big and crooked it is. Must take a one-gallon bag to fill that schnozzola.

I love powdery gum too!!


Who's buying that one?

Maybe it was used gum, and she got a little blow on it when she chewed it. It could happen to anyone, especially with a nose that size. A nasal blizzard onto her mouth.

OT/ I don't know if there's a Whataburger near where any of y'all live, but there's one less than two minutes from my house, depending on one light.

That Barbeque Cheddar Burger ad is very effective. Whataburger is my favorite fast food burger anyway, and this flavor is especially good.

Yes, it's dinner time and yes, I'm hungry.

/OT

She just got another million dollars of free publicity out of this incident, and probably a dozen free designer purses to display at her next arrest.

And the .... gum..... in her nose is for structural support, right?

Is bonmot being paid to schlep Whataburger? That sure sounded like a commercial break to me.

Shoulda posted that a little sooner, but I simply couldn't tear myself away from this delicious Papa John's pizza. It is to pizza what Dave Barry is to toilet humor.

What's up with all the anti-nose comments? Why criticize her for the one thing in her life that isn't her fault?

Annie and bonmot need to quit talking about food! I have a cold and cannot taste anything so I had chicken noodle soup for supper. It was homemade so I can't advertise for the brand. I do agree with Annie though about Papa John's. I especially like it with banana peppers on it. Yum! We don't have a What A Burger but we are getting a Dunkin Donuts. That is considered big news here in my little town.

Paris Hilton actually thought something?

Are you pulling our (collective) leg, Dave?

She's more of a vacuum than my Dyson.

She's trying the ID-10-T defense. The jury will probably believe her. I would.

Paris:
Don't scare us!
You're such a bad heiress -
Your story's too crazy to follow!
Were you really that dumb
To get caught with 'the gum'?
(...and why didn't you spit or swallow??!)

...ew!


*heiress flip*

Hate to be a snob here but in New York we eat real pizza.

*bada bing*

Didn't Paris already use the "it's not my purse" defense last arrest, by the way?

I think she needs new material.

Her back is scrawny and her brain is weak
She's just plain stupid with a stubborn streak
And by the way, if you hate to go to school
You may grow up to be a [drug] mule

The perils of the lucky sperm club.

Oneblank:

Oops!

Old eyes, fast fingers, and a profound boredom for the divine Ms. H.

Plus eight grams makes for better hyperbole.

Maybe she wanted to take her gum on a plane?

Ut oh, Cheesie's in the metric doghouse.
Btw, I think 'baggie' has become a unit of measurement in the U.S.

And who believes she has to borrow a purse?

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