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May 15, 2010

WE CAN TOTALLY RELATE HAVE NO COMMENT

Husband bails from moving vehicle after wife refuses to 'shut up'

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins)

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He so eloquently stated his position and paid such a high price.
Sometimes a married man just needs to be quiet.

Oh yeah! A new hero is born.

Sometimes it's bad and other times it's REALLY BAD!

The man sustained serious injuries and was flown by helicopter to Vanderbilt University Medical Center

Of course, when he started to jump she floored it.

Well..duh, Jeff. I'd help push him out. I'm considerate that way.

Adding insult to injury, she accompanied him in the air ambulance.

Let's see him bail outta THAT, Horace ;P

Once he's in traction, the wife could visit him in hospital to finish their little conversation.

Between the headline and the digs in your new book, I gotta ask: everything OK at home, Dave?

At the hospital room, the man stirs slowly back to consciousness, to find his wife gently stroking his hand and offering soothing sips of ice water. There are tubes in his arm, electrodes fixed to his forehead and chest, and an array of monitors next to his bed.

"Wha ... what happened?"

"Doc says you're gonna be fine, you just need a little rest."

"Wow. Okay .... What's this?"

"That's a little call button. Press it once if you need the nurse, and hold it down until it buzzes if you feel major pain."

"Right."

The wife adjusts her husband's pillow.

"Is that better?"

"Yeah, thanks."

The man shuts eyes and folds his hands over his chest. A short sigh emerges from his lips.

"Now. About what I was saying to you in the car ....."

MONITORS BLARE OUT A SHRILL SUSTAINED BEEP AS THE REGULAR SPIKY PATTERNS ON THE SCREEN GO FLAT. A LOUD BUZZ IS HEARD, FOLLOWED SHORTLY BY THE SLAM OF A DOOR THROWN OPEN AGAINST THE WALL AS TWO NURSES AND A SECURITY GUARD BURST INTO THE ROOM.

The wife rapidly gathers up her jacket and purse to give the nurses enough space. She quietly leaves the room, with the corner of a hastily folded life insurance policy sticking out of the zippered outside pocket of her purse, and the merest hint of a smirk on her face.

He could have asked her to pull over for a second and jumped out but I guess he just couldn't take the sound of her voice for one more second he was in a hurry.

Meanie, get OUT OF MY HEAD!!!!

If dear sweet Mr. Coconuts told me to "shut up" while I was driving, and if he bailed out of the car, I'd have to keep going.

Just sayin'

He has three kids, and he doesn't know "LALALALALA, I CAN"T HEAR YOU?"

However bad his injuries were, you know damm well they were worth it.

It's been like that ever since the preacher said, "Speak now..."

If he had just told her, " You absolutely right, dear". This wouldn't have happened. But no! He always has to have the last word. He's just like his mother and thinks it's either his way or the highway. Hey! Come back here!

"Dear, CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?"

It's all her assfault.

The article should've mentioned that she was his current wife.

I wonder if alcohol was involved.

Only at the time he said "I do."

I have SO been there!

The only way to approach this is to ask: " What would Malcolm Reynolds do ? "

Well, that's why Mrs. Loudmouth (appropriate, but if she knew she could be associated with the nom de plume she would not appreciate it) and I do not travel together anymore.

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